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see that he couldn't look me in the face。  'Where's my wife?' I said。

He answered; 'Let's get Lucy。'  I ran indoors。  Lucy met me with two

letters; the firstmy ownunopened; and the second; this:



〃'I have left you。  You were good to me; but nowit is no use。

          EILIE。'〃



〃She told me that a boy had brought a letter for my wife the day

before; from a young gentleman in a boat。  When Lucy delivered it she

asked; 'Who is he; Miss Eilie?  What will Mr。 Brune say?'  My wife

looked at her angrily; but gave her no answerand all that day she

never spoke。  In the evening she was gone; leaving this note on the

bed。。。。  Lucy cried as if her heart would break。  I took her by the

shoulders and put her from the room; I couldn't bear the noise。  I

sat down and tried to think。  While I was sitting there Tor came in

with a letter。  It was written on the notepaper of an inn twelve

miles up the river: these were the words。



〃'Eilie is mine。  I am ready to meet you where you like。'〃



He went on with a painful evenness of speech。  〃When I read those

words; I had only one thoughtto reach them; I ran down to the

river; and chose out the lightest boat。  Just as I was starting; Tor

came running。  'You dropped this letter; sir;' be said。  'Two pair of

arms are better than one。'  He came into the boat。  I took the sculls

and I pulled out into the stream。  I pulled like a madman; and that

great man; with his bare arms crossed; was like a huge; tawny bull

sitting there opposite me。  Presently he took my place; and I took

the rudder lines。  I could see his chest; covered with hair; heaving

up and down; it gave me a sort of comfortit meant that we were

getting nearer。  Then it grew dark; there was no moon; I could barely

see the bank; there's something in the dark which drives one into

oneself。  People tell you there comes a moment when your nature is

decided'saved' or 'lost' as they call itfor good or evil。  That

is not true; your self is always with you; and cannot be altered;

but; sir; I believe that in a time of agony one finds out what are

the things one can do; and what are those one cannot。  You get to

know yourself; that's all。  And so it was with me。  Every thought and

memory and passion was so clear and strong!  I wanted to kill him。  I

wanted to kill myself。  But herno!  We are taught that we possess

our wives; body and soul; we are brought up in that faith; we are

commanded to believe itbut when I was face to face with it; those

words had no meaning; that belief; those commands; they were without

meaning to me; they werevile。  Oh yes; I wanted to find comfort in

them; I wanted to hold on to thembut I couldn't。  You may force a

body; how can you force a soul?  No; nocowardly!  But I wanted to

I wanted to kill him and force her to come back to me!  And then;

suddenly; I felt as if I were pressing right on the most secret nerve

of my heart。  I seemed to see her face; white and quivering; as if

I'd stamped my heel on it。  They say this world is ruled by force; it

may be trueI know I have a weak spot in me。。。。  I couldn't bear it。

At last I Jumped to my feet and shouted out; 'Turn the boat round!'

Tor looked up at me as if I had gone mad。  And I had gone mad。  I

seized the boat…hook and threatened him; I called him fearful names。

'Sir;' he said; 'I don't take such names from any one!'  'You'll take

them from me;' I shouted; 'turn the boat round; you idiot; you hound;

you fish!。。。'  I have a terrible temper; a perfect curse to me。  He

seemed amazed; even frightened; he sat down again suddenly and pulled

the boat round。  I fell on the seat; and hid my face。  I believe the

moon came up; there must have been a mist too; for I was cold as

death。  In this life; sir; we cannot hide our facesbut by degrees

the pain of wounds grows less。  Some will have it that such blows are

mortal; it is not so。  Time is merciful。



〃In the early morning I went back to London。  I had fever on meand

was delirious。  I dare say I should have killed myself if I had not

been so used to weaponsthey and I were too old friends; I suppose

I can't explain。  It was a long while before I was up and about。

Dalton nursed me through it; his great heavy moustache had grown

quite white。  We never mentioned her; what was the good?  There were

things to settle of course; the lawyerthis was unspeakably

distasteful to me。  I told him it was to be as she wished; but the

fellow would come to me; with histhere; I don't want to be unkind。

I wished him to say it was my fault; but he saidI remember his

smile nowhe said; that was impossible; would be seen through;

talked of collusionI don't understand these things; and what's

more; I can't bear them; they aredirty。



〃Two years later; when I had come back to London; after the Russo…

Turkish war; I received a letter from her。  I have it here。〃  He took

an old; yellow sheet of paper out of a leathern pocketbook; spread it

in his fingers; and sat staring at it。  For some minutes he did not

speak。



〃In the autumn of that same year she died in childbirth。  He had

deserted her。  Fortunately for him; he was killed on the Indian

frontier; that very year。  If she had lived she would have been

thirty…two next June; not a great age。。。。  I know I am what they call

a crank; doctors will tell you that you can't be cured of a bad

illness; and be the same man again。  If you are bent; to force

yourself straight must leave you weak in another place。  I must and

will think well of womeneverything done; and everything said

against them is a stone on her dead body。  Could you sit; and listen

to it?〃  As though driven by his own question; he rose; and paced up

and down。  He came back to the seat at last。



〃That; sir; is the reason of my behaviour this afternoon; and again

this evening。  You have been so kind; I wanted!wanted to tell you。

She had a little daughterLucy has her now。  My friend Dalton is

dead; there would have been no difficulty about money; but; I am

sorry to say; that he was swindleddisgracefully。  It fell to me to

administer his affairshe never knew it; but he died penniless; he

had trusted some wretched fellowshad an idea they would make his

fortune。  As I very soon found; they had ruined him。  It was

impossible to let Lucysuch a dear womanbear that burden。  I have

tried to make provision; but; you see;〃 he took hold of my sleeve;

〃I; too; have not been fortunate; in fact; it's difficult to save a

great deal out of L 190 a year; but the capital is perfectly safe

and I get L 47; 10s。 a quarter; paid on the nail。  I have often been

tempted to reinvest at a greater rate of interest; but I've never

dared。  Anyway; there are no debtsI've been obliged to make a rule

not to buy what I couldn't pay for on the spot。。。。  Now I am really

plaguing youbut I wanted to tell youin case…anything should

happen to me。〃  He seemed to take a sudden scare; stiffened; twisted

his moustache; and muttering; 〃Your great kindness! Shall never

forget!〃 turned hurriedly away。



He vanished; his footsteps; and the tap of his stick grew fainter and

fainter。  They died out。  He was gone。  Suddenly I got up and

hastened after him。  I soon stoppedwhat was there to say?









VIII



The following day I was obliged to go to Nice; and did not return

till midnight。  The porter told me that Jules le Ferrier had been to

see me。  The next morning; while I was still in bed; the door was

opened; and Jules appeared。  His face was very pale; and the moment

he stood still drops of perspiration began coursing down his cheeks。



〃Georges!〃 he said; 〃he is dead。  There; there!  How stupid you look!

My man is packing。  I have half an hour before the train; my evidence

shall come from Italy。  I have done my part; the rest is for you。

Why did you have that dinner?  The Don Quixote!  The idiot!  The poor

man!  Don't move!  Have you a cigar?  Listen!  When you followed him;

I followed the other two。  My infernal curiosity!  Can you conceive a

greater folly?  How fast they walked; those two! feeling their

cheeks; as if he had struck them both; you know; it was funny。  They

soon saw me; for their eyes were all round about their heads; they

had the mark of a glove on their cheeks。〃  The colour began to come

back; into Jules's face; he gesticulated with his cigar and became

more and more dramatic。  〃They waited for me。  'Tiens!' said one;

'this gentleman was with him。  My friend's name is M。 Le Baron de…。

The man who struck him was an odd…looking person; kindly inform me

whether it is possible for my friend to meet him?'  Eh!〃 commented

Jules; 〃he was offensive!  Was it for me to give our dignity away?

'Perfectly; monsieur!'  I answered。  'In that case;' he said; 'please

give me his name and ad dress。。。。  I could not remember his name; and

as for the address; I never knew it。。。!  I reflected。 'That;' I said;

'I am unable to do; for special reasons。'  'Aha!' he said; 'reasons

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