ragged lady, v1-第15节

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confess　before　him；　they　were　there　in　the　place　of　the　child's　father
and　mother；　and　it　was　due　to　them。　　As　he　pressed　rapidly　toward　the
light　he　framed　in　his　thought　the　things　he　should　say；　and　he　did　not
notice；　as　he　turned　to　enter　the　private　hallway　leading　to　Mrs。
Atwell's　apartment；　a　figure　at　the　door。　　It　shrank　back　from　his
contact；　and　he　recognized　Clementina。　　His　purpose　instantly　changed；
and　he　said；　〃Is　that　you；　Miss　Claxon？　　I　want　to　speak　with　you。　　Will
you　come　a　moment　where　I　can？〃

〃II　don't　know　as　I'd　betta；〃　she　faltered。　　But　she　saw　the　box　under
his　arm；　and　she　thought　that　he　wished　to　speak　to　her　about　that；　and
she　wanted　to　hear　what　he　would　say。　　She　had　been　waiting　at　the　door
there；　because　she　could　not　bear　to　go　to　her　room　without　having
something　more　happen。

〃You　needn't　be　afraid。　　I　shall　not　keep　you。　　Come　with　me　a　moment。
There　is　something　I　must　tell　you　at　once。　　You　have　made　a　mistake。
And　it　is　my　fault。　　Come！〃

Clementina　stepped　out　into　the　moonlight　with　him；　and　they　walked
across　the　grass　that　sloped　between　the　hotel　and　the　river。　　There　were
still　people　about；　late　smokers　singly；　and　in　groups　along　the　piazzas；
and　young　couples；　like　themselves；　strolling　in　the　dry　air；　under　the
pure　sky。

Gregory　made　several　failures　in　trying　to　begin；　before　he　said：　〃I　have
to　tell　you　that　you　are　mistaken　about　Mr。　Fane。　　I　was　there　behind　the
letter　boxes　when　you　came　in；　and　I　know　that　you　left　these　shoes
because　you　thought　he　sent　them　to　you。　　He　didn't　send　them。〃
Clementina　did　not　say　anything；　and　Gregory　was　forced　to　ask：　〃Do　you
wish　to　know　who　sent　them？　　I　won't　tell　you　unless　you　do　wish　it。〃

〃I　think　I　ought　to　know；〃　she　said；　and　she　asked；　〃Don't　you？〃

〃Yes；　for　you　must　blame　some　one　else　now；　for　what　you　thought　Fane
did。　　I　sent　them　to　you。〃

Clementina's　heart　gave　a　leap　in　her　breast；　and　she　could　not　say
anything。　　He　went　on。

〃I　saw　that　you　wanted　them　that　day；　and　when　the　peddler　happened　to
overtake　me　in　the　woods　where　I　was　walking；　after　I　left　you；　I　acted
on　a　sudden　impulse；　and　I　bought　them　for　you。　　I　meant　to　send　them　to
you　anonymously；　then。　　I　had　committed　one　error　in　acting　upon　impulse…
my　rashness　is　my　besetting　sinand　I　wished　to　add　a　species　of　deceit
to　that。　　But　I　was　kept　from　it　until…to…day。　　I　hoped　you　would　like　to
wear　them　to　the　dance　to…night；　and　I　put　them　in　the　post…office　for
you　myself。　　Mr。　Fane　didn't　know　anything　about　it。　　That　is　all。　　I　am
to　blame；　and　no　one　else。〃

He　waited　for　her　to　speak；　but　Clementina　could　only　say；　〃I　don't　know
what　to　say。〃

〃You　can't　say　anything　that　would　be　punishment　enough　for　me。　　I　have
acted　foolishly；　cruelly。〃

Clementina　did　not　think　so。　　She　was　not　indignant；　as　she　was　when　she
thought　Fane　had　taken　this　liberty　with　her；　but　if　Mr。　Gregory　thought
it　was　so　very　bad；　it　must　be　something　much　more　serious　than　she　had
imagined。　　She　said；　〃I　don't　see　why　you　wanted　to　do　it；〃　hoping　that
he　would　be　able　to　tell　her　something　that　would　make　his　behavior　seem
less　dreadful　than　he　appeared　to　think　it　was。

〃There　is　only　one　thing　that　could　justify　it；　and　that　is　something
that　I　cannot　justify。〃　　It　was　very　mysterious；　but　youth　loves　mystery；
and　Clementina　was　very　young。　　〃I　did　it；〃　said　Gregory　solemnly；　and　he
felt　that　now　he　was　acting　from　no　impulse；　but　from　a　wisely　considered
decision　which　he　might　not　fail　in　without　culpability；　〃because　I　love
you。〃

〃Oh！〃　said　Clementina；　and　she　started　away　from　him。

〃I　knew　that　it　would　make　me　detestable！〃　he　cried；　bitterly。　　〃I　had　to
tell　you；　to　explain　what　I　did。　　I　couldn't　help　doing　it。　　But　now　if
you　can　forget　it；　and　never　think　of　me　again；　I　can　go　away；　and　try　to
atone　for　it　somehow。　　I　shall　be　guided。〃

Clementina　did　not　know　why　she　ought　to　feel　affronted　or　injured　by
what　he　had　said　to　her；　but　if　Mr。　Gregory　thought　it　was　wrong　for　him
to　have　spoken　so；　it　must　be　wrong。　　She　did　not　wish　him　to　feel　badly；
even　if　he　had　done　wrong；　but　she　had　to　take　his　view　of　what　he　had
done。　　〃Why；　suttainly；　Mr。　Gregory；〃　she　answered。　　〃You　mustn't　mind
it。〃

〃But　I　do　mind　it。　　I　have　been　very；　very　selfish；　very　thoughtless。　　We
are　both　too　young。　　I　can't　ask　you　to　wait　for　me　till　I　could　marry〃

The　word　really　frightened　Clementina。　　She　said；　〃I　don't　believe　I
betta　promise。〃

〃Oh；　I　know　it！〃　　said　Gregory。　　〃I　am　going　away　from　here。　　I　am　going
to…morrow　as　soon　as　I　can　arrangeas　soon　as　I　can　get　away。　　Good…
nightI〃Clementina　in　her　agitation　put　her　hands　up　to　her　face。
〃Oh；　don't　cryI　can't　bear　to　have　you　cry。〃

She　took　down　her　hands。　　〃I'm　not　crying！　　But　I　wish　I　had　neva　seen
those　slippas。〃

They　had　come　to　the　bank　of　the　river；　whose　current　quivered　at　that
point　in　a　scaly　ripple　in　the　moonlight。　　At　her　words　Gregory　suddenly
pulled　the　box　from　under　his　arm；　and　flung　it　into　the　stream　as　far　as
he　could。　　It　caught　upon　a　shallow　of　the　ripple；　hung　there　a　moment；
then　loosed　itself；　and　swam　swiftly　down　the　stream。

〃Oh！〃　Clementina　moaned。

〃Do　you　want　them　back？〃　　he　demanded。　　〃I　will　go　in　for　them！〃

〃No；　no！　　No。　　But　it　seemed　such　awaste！〃

〃Yes；　that　is　a　sin；　too。〃　　They　climbed　silently　to　the　hotel。　　At　Mrs。
Atwell's　door；　he　spoke。　　〃Try　to　forget　what　I　said；　and　forgive　me；　if
you　can。〃

〃Yesyes；　I　will；　Mr。　Gregory。　　You　mustn't　think　of　it　any　moa。〃




XII。

Clementina　did　not　sleep　till　well　toward　morning；　and　she　was　still
sleeping　when　Mrs。　Atwell　knocked　and　called　in　to　her　that　her　brother
Jim　wanted　to　see　her。　　She　hurried　down；　and　in　the　confusion　of　mind
left　over　from　the　night　before　she　cooed　sweetly　at　Jim　as　if　he　had
been　Mr。　Gregory；　〃What　is　it；　Jim？　　What　do　you　want　me　for？〃

The　boy　answered　with　the　disgust　a　sister's　company　manners　always　rouse
in　a　brother。　　〃Motha　wants　you。　　Says　she's　wo'ked　down；　and　she　wants
you　to　come　and　help。〃　　Then　he　went　his　way。

Mrs。　Atwell　was　used　to　having　help　snatched　from　her　by　their　families
at　a　moment's　notice。　　〃I　presume　you've　got　to　go；　Clem；〃　she　said。

〃Oh；　yes；　I've　got　to　go；〃　Clementina　assented；　with　a　note　of　relief
which　mystified　Mrs。　Atwell。

〃You　tied　readin'　to　Mr。　Milray？〃

〃Oh；　no'm…no；　I　mean。　　But　I　guess　I　betta　go　home。　　I　guess　I've　been
away　long　enough。〃

〃Well；　you're　a　good　gul；　Clem。　　I　presume　your　motha's　got　a　right　to
have　you　home　if　she　wants　you。〃　　Clementina　said　nothing　to　this；　but
turned　briskly；　and　started　upstairs　toward　her　room　again。　　The　landlady
called　after　her；　〃Shall　you　speak　to　Mis'　Milray；　or　do　you　want　I
should？〃

Clementina　looked　back　at　her　over　her　shoulder　to　warble；　〃Why；　if　you
would；　Mrs。　Atwell；〃　and　kept　on　to　her　room。

Mrs。　Milray　was　not　wholly　sorry　to　have　her　go；　she　was　going　herself
very　soon；　and　Clementina's　earlier　departure　simplified　the　question　of
getting　rid　of　her；　but　she　overwhelmed　her　with　reproaches　which
Clementina　received　with　such　sweet　sincerity　that　another　than　Mrs。
Milray　might　have　blamed　herself　for　having　abused　her　ingenuousness。

The　Atwells　could　very　well　have　let　the　girl　walk　home；　but　they　sent
her　in　a　buckboard；　with　one　of　the　stablemen　to　drive　her。　　The　landlord
put　her　neat　bundle　under　the　seat　of　the　buckboard　with　his　own　hand。
There　was　something　in　the　child's　bearing；　her　dignity　and　her
amiability；　which　made　people　offer　her；　half　in　fun；　and　half　in
earnest；　the　deference　paid　to　age　and　state。

She　did　not　know　whether　Gregory　would　try　to　see　her　before　she　went。
She　thought　he　must　have　known　she　was　going；　but　since　he　neither　came
to　take　leave　of　her；　nor　sent　her　any　message；　she　decided　that　she　had
not　expected　him　to　do　so。　　About　the　third　week　of　September　she　heard
that　he　had　left　Middlemount　and　gone　back　to　college。

She　kept　at　her　work　in　the　house　and　helped　her　mother；　and　looked　after
the　little　ones；　she　followed　her　father　in　the　woods；　in　his　quest　of
stuff　for　walking　sticks；　and　advised　with　both　concerning　the　taste　of
summer　folks　in　dress　and　in　canes。　　The　winter　came；　and　she　read　many
books　in　its　long　leisure；　mostly　novels；　out　of　the　rector's　library。
He　had　a　whole　set　of　Miss　Edgeworth；　and　nearly　all　of　Miss　Austen　and
Miss　Gurney；　and　he　gave　of　them　to　Clementina；　as　the　best　thing　for　her
mind　as　well　as　her　morals；　he　believed　nothing　could　be　better　for　any
one　than　these　old　English　novels；　which　he　had　nearly　forgotten　in　their
details。　　She　colored　the　faded　English　life　of　the　stories　afresh　from
her　Yankee　circumstance；　and　it　seemed　the　consensus　of　their　testimony
that　she　had　really　been　made　love　to；　and　not　so　very　much　too　soon；　at
her　age　of　sixteen；　for　most　of　their　heroines　were　not　much　older。　　The
terms　of　Gregory's　declaration　and　of　its　withdrawal　were　mystifying；　but
not　more　mystifying　than　many　such　things；　and　from　what　happened　in　the
novels　she　read；　the　affair　might　be　trusted　to　come　out　all　right　of
itself　in　time。　　She　was　rather　thoug