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第75节

robert falconer-第75节

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sole proof of which these truths admit; a man must grow into harmony

with them。  If there are no such things he cannot become conscious

of a harmony that has no existence; he cannot thus deceive himself;

if there are; they must yet remain doubtful until the harmony

between them and his own willing nature is established。  The

perception of this harmony is their only and incommunicable proof。

For this process time is needful; and therefore we are saved by

hope。  Hence it is no wonder that before another half…hour was over;

Ericson was asleep by Robert's side。



They were aroused in the cold gray light of the morning by the blast

of Hector's horn。  Miss St。 John was ready in a moment。  The coach

was waiting for them at the end of the grassy road that led from the

house。  Hector put them all inside。  Before they reached Rothieden

the events of the night began to wear the doubtful aspect of a

dream。  No allusion was made to what had occurred while Robert

slept; but all the journey Ericson felt towards Miss St。 John as

Wordsworth felt towards the leech…gatherer; who; he says; was



          like a man from some far region sent;

     To give me human strength; by apt admonishment。



And Robert saw a certain light in her eyes which reminded him of how

she looked when; having repented of her momentary hardness towards

him; she was ministering to his wounded head。









CHAPTER XVII。



HOME AGAIN。



When Robert opened the door of his grandmother's parlour; he found

the old lady seated at breakfast。  She rose; pushed back her chair;

and met him in the middle of the room; put her old arms round him;

offered her smooth white cheek to him; and wept。  Robert wondered

that she did not look older; for the time he had been away seemed an

age; although in truth only eight months。



'Hoo are ye; laddie?' she said。 'I'm richt glaid; for I hae been

thinkin' lang to see ye。  Sit ye doon。'



Betty rushed in; drying her hands on her apron。  She had not heard

him enter。



'Eh losh!' she cried; and put her wet apron to her eyes。 'Sic a man

as ye're grown; Robert!  A puir body like me maunna be speykin to ye

noo。'



'There's nae odds in me; Betty;' returned Robert。



''Deed but there is。  Ye're sax feet an' a hairy ower; I s'

warran'。'



'I said there was nae odds i' me; Betty;' persisted Robert;

laughing。



'I kenna what may be in ye;' retorted Betty; 'but there's an unco'

odds upo' ye。'



'Haud yer tongue; Betty;' said her mistress。 'Ye oucht to ken better

nor stan' jawin' wi' young men。  Fess mair o' the creamy cakes。'



'Maybe Robert wad like a drappy o' parritch。'



'Onything; Betty;' said Robert。 'I'm at deith's door wi' hunger。'



'Rin; Betty; for the cakes。  An' fess a loaf o' white breid; we

canna bide for the parritch。'



Robert fell to his breakfast; and while he atesomewhat

ravenouslyhe told his grandmother the adventures of the night; and

introduced the question whether he might not ask Ericson to stay a

few days with him。



'Ony frien' o' yours; laddie;' she replied; qualifying her words

only with the addition'gin he be a frien'。Whaur is he noo?'



'He's up at Miss Naper's。'



'Hoots!  What for didna ye fess him in wi' ye?Betty!'



'Na; na; grannie。  The Napers are frien's o' his。  We maunna

interfere wi' them。  I'll gang up mysel' ance I hae had my

brakfast。'



'Weel; weel; laddie。  Eh!  I'm blythe to see ye!  Hae ye gotten ony

prizes noo?'



'Ay have I。 I'm sorry they're nae baith o' them the first。  But I

hae the first o' ane an' the third o' the ither。'



'I am pleased at that; Robert。  Ye'll be a man some day gin ye haud

frae drink an' fraefrae leein'。'



'I never tellt a lee i' my life; grannie。'



'Na。 I dinna think 'at ever ye did。An' what's that crater Shargar

aboot?'



'Ow; jist gaein' to be a croon o' glory to ye; grannie。  He vroucht

like a horse till Dr。 Anderson took him by the han'; an' sent him to

the schuil。  An' he's gaein' to mak something o' 'im; or a' be dune。

He's a fine crater; Shargar。'



'He tuik a munelicht flittin' frae here;' rejoined the old lady; in

a tone of offence。 'He micht hae said gude day to me; I think。'



'Ye see he was feart at ye; grannie。'



'Feart at me; laddie!  Wha ever was feart at me?  I never feart

onybody i' my life。'



So little did the dear old lady know that she was a terror to her

neighbourhood!simply because; being a law to herself; she would

therefore be a law to other people;a conclusion that cannot be

concluded。



Mrs。 Falconer's courtesy did not fail。  Her grandson had ceased to

be a child; her responsibility had in so far ceased; her conscience

was relieved at being rid of it; and the humanity of her great heart

came out to greet the youth。  She received Ericson with perfect

hospitality; made him at home as far as the stately respect she

showed him would admit of his being so; and confirmed in him the

impression of her which Robert had given him。  They held many talks

together; and such was the circumspection of Ericson that; not

saying a word he did not believe; he so said what he did believe; or

so avoided the points upon which they would have differed seriously;

that although his theology was of course far from satisfying her;

she yet affirmed her conviction that the root of the matter was in

him。  This distressed Ericson; however; for he feared he must have

been deceitful; if not hypocritical。



It was with some grumbling that the Napiers; especially Miss Letty;

parted with him to Mrs。 Falconer。  The hearts of all three had so

taken to the youth; that he found himself more at home in that

hostelry than anywhere else in the world。  Miss Letty was the only

one that spoke lightly of himshe even went so far as to make

good…natured game of him sometimesall because she loved him more

than the othersmore indeed than she cared to show; for fear of

exposing 'an old woman's ridiculous fancy;' as she called her

predilection。'A lang…leggit; prood; landless laird;' she would

say; with a moist glimmer in her loving eyes; 'wi' the maist

ridiculous feet ye ever sawhardly room for the five taes atween

the twa!  Losh!'



When Robert went forth into the streets; he was surprised to find

how friendly every one was。  Even old William MacGregor shook him

kindly by the hand; inquired after his health; told him not to study

too hard; informed him that he had a copy of a queer old book that

he would like to see; &c。; &c。  Upon reflection Robert discovered

the cause: though he had scarcely gained a bursary; he had gained

prizes; and in a little place like Rothiedenlong may there be such

places!everybody with any brains at all took a share in the

distinction he had merited。



Ericson stayed only a few days。  He went back to the twilight of the

north; his fishy cousin; and his tutorship at Sir Olaf Petersen's。

Robert accompanied him ten miles on his journey; and would have

gone further; but that he was to play on his violin before Miss St。

John the next day for the first time。



When he told his grandmother of the appointment he had made; she

only remarked; in a tone of some satisfaction;



'Weel; she's a fine lass; Miss St。 John; and gin ye tak to ane

anither; ye canna do better。'



But Robert's thoughts were so different from Mrs。 Falconer's that he

did not even suspect what she meant。  He no more dreamed of marrying

Miss St。 John than of marrying his forbidden grandmother。  Yet she

was no loss at this period the ruling influence of his life; and if

it had not been for the benediction of her presence and power; this

part of his history too would have been torn by inward troubles。  It

is not good that a man should batter day and night at the gate of

heaven。  Sometimes he can do nothing else; and then nothing else is

worth doing; but the very noise of the siege will sometimes drown

the still small voice that calls from the open postern。  There is a

door wide to the jewelled wall not far from any one of us; even when

he least can find it。



Robert; however; notwithstanding the pedestal upon which Miss St。

John stood in his worshipping regard; began to be aware that his

feeling towards her was losing something of its placid flow; and I

doubt whether Miss St。 John did not now and then see that in his

face which made her tremble a little; and doubt whether she stood on

safe ground with a youth just waking into manhoodtremble a little;

not for herself; but for him。  Her fear would have found itself more

than justified; if she had surprised him kissing her glove; and then

replacing it where he had found it; with the air of one consciously

guilty of presumption。



Possibly also Miss St。 John may have had to confess to herself that

had she not had her history already; and been ten years his senior;

she might have found no little attraction in the noble bearing and

handsome face of young 

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