the dust-第20节

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us　rather　than　merry；　that　was　her　habitual　greeting。　　〃Mr。　Tetlow　didn't　get　away　from　father　so　soon。〃

〃I　stayed　longer　than　I　intended。　　I　found　it　even　more　interesting　than　I　had　expected。　。　。　。　　Would　you　be　glad　if　your　father　could　be　free　to　do　as　he　likes　and　not　be　worried　about　anything？〃

〃That　is　one　of　my　dreams。〃

〃Well；　it's　certainly　one　that　might　come　true。　。　。　。　And　you　　It's　a　shame　that　you　should　have　to　do　so　much　drudgeryboth　here　and　in　New　York。〃

〃Oh；　I　don't　mind　about　myself。　　It's　all　I'm　fit　for。　　I　haven't　any　talentexcept　for　dreaming。〃

〃And　for　makingSOME　man's　dreams　come　true。〃

Her　gaze　dropped。　　And　as　she　hid　herself　she　looked　once　more　almost　as　insignificant　and　colorless　as　he　had　once　believed　her　to　be。

〃What　are　you　thinking　about？〃

She　shook　her　head　slowly　without　raising　her　eyes　or　emerging　from　the　deep　recess　of　her　reserve。

〃You　are　a　mystery　to　me。　　I　can't　decide　whether　you　are　very　innocent　or　veryconcealing。〃

She　glanced　inquiringly　at　him。　　〃I　don't　understand；〃　she　said。

He　smiled。　　〃No　more　do　I。　　I've　seen　so　much　of　fakingin　women　as　well　as　in　menthat　it's　hard　for　me　to　believe　anyone　is　genuine。〃

〃Do　you　think　I　am　trying　to　deceive　you？　　About　what？〃

He　made　an　impatient　gestureimpatience　with　his　credulity　where　she　was　concerned。　　〃No　matter。　　I　want　to　make　you　happybecause　I　want　you　to　make　me　happy。〃

Her　eyes　became　as　grave　as　a　wondering　child's。　〃You　are　laughing　at　me；〃　she　said。

〃Why　do　you　say　that？〃

〃Because　I　could　not　make　you　happy。〃

〃Why　not？〃

〃What　could　a　serious　man　like　you　find　in　me？〃

His　intense；　burning　gaze　held　hers。　　〃Some　time　I　will　tell　you。〃

She　shut　herself　within　herself　like　a　flower　folding　away　its　beauty　and　leaving　exposed　only　the　underside　of　its　petals。　　It　was　impossible　to　say　whether　she　understood　or　was　merely　obeying　an　instinct。

He　watched　her　a　moment　in　silence。　　Then　he　said：

〃I　am　mad　about　youmad。　　You　MUST　understand。　I　can　think　only　of　you。　　I　am　insane　with　jealousy　of　you。　　I　want　youI　must　have　you。〃

He　would　have　seized　her　in　his　arms；　but　the　look　of　sheer　amazement　she　gave　him　protected　her　where　no　protest　or　struggle　would。　　〃You？〃　she　said。　　〃Did　you　really　mean　it？　　I　thought　you　were　just　talking。〃

〃Can't　you　see　that　I　mean　it？〃

〃Yesyou　look　as　if　you　did。　　But　I　can't　believe　it。　　I　could　never　think　of　you　in　that　way。〃

Once　more　that　frank　statement　of　indifference　infuriated　him。　　He　MUST　compel　her　to　feelhe　must　give　that　indifference　the　lieand　at　once！　　He　caught　her　in　his　arms。　　He　rained　kisses　upon　her　pale　face。　She　made　not　the　least　resistance；　but　seemed　dazed。　〃I　will　teach　you　to　love　me；〃　he　cried；　drunk　now　with　the　wine　of　her　lips；　with　the　perfume　of　her　exquisite　youth。　　〃I　will　make　you　happy。　　We　shall　be　mad　with　happiness。〃

She　gently　freed　herself。　　〃I　don't　believe　I　could　ever　think　of　you　in　that　way。〃

〃Yes；　darlingyou　will。　　You　can't　help　loving　where　you　are　loved　so　utterly。〃

She　gazed　at　him　wonderinglythe　puzzled　wonder　of　a　child。　　〃Youloveme？〃　she　said　slowly。

〃Call　it　what　you　like。　　I　am　mad　about　you。　　I　have　forgotten　everythingpridepositionthings　you　can't　imagineand　I　care　for　nothing　but　you。〃

And　again　he　was　kissing　her　with　the　soft　fury　of　fire；　and　again　she　was　submitting　with　the　passive；　dazed　expression　that　seemed　to　add　to　his　passion。　　To　make　her　feel！　　To　make　her　respond！　　He；　whom　so　many　women　had　lovedwomen　of　position；　of　fame　for　beauty；　of　social　distinction　or　distinction　as　singers；　playerswomen　of　society　and　women　of　talent　all　kinds　of　worth…while　womenthey　had　cared；　had　run　after　him；　had　given　freely　all　he　had　asked　and　more。　And　this　girlnobody　at　allshe　had　nothing　for　him。

He　held　her　away　from　him；　cried　angrily：　　〃What　is　the　matter　with　you？　　What　is　the　matter　with　me？〃

〃I　don't　understand；〃　she　said。　　〃I　wish　you　wouldn't　kiss　me　so　much。〃

He　released　her；　laughed　satirically。　　〃Ohyou　are　playing　a　game。　　I　might　have　known。〃

〃I　don't　understand；〃　said　she。　　〃A　while　ago　you　said　you　loved　me。　　Now　you　act　as　if　you　didn't　like　me　at　all。〃　　And　she　smiled　gayly　at　him；　pouting　her　lips　a　little。　　Once　more　her　beauty　was　shining。　　It　made　his　nerves　quiver　to　see　the　color　in　her　pure　white　skin　where　he　had　kissed　her。

〃I　don't　care　whether　it　is　a　game　or　not；〃　he　cried。　　And　he　was　about　to　seize　her　again；　when　she　repulsed　him。　　He　crushed　her　resistance；　held　her　tight　in　his　arms。

〃You　frighten　me；〃　she　murmured。　　〃Youhurt　me。〃

He　released　her。　　〃What　do　you　want？〃　he　cried。　〃Don't　you　care　at　all？〃

〃Oh；　yes。　　I　like　youvery　much。　　I　have　from　the　first　time　I　saw　you。　　But　you　seem　olderand　more　serious。〃

〃Never　mind　about　that。　　We　are　going　to　love　each　otherand　I　am　going　to　make　you　and　your　father　happy。〃

〃If　you　make　father　happy　I　will　do　anything　for　you。　　I　don't　want　anything　myselfbut　he　is　getting　old　and　sometimes　his　despair　is　terrible。〃　　There　were　tears　in　her　voicetears　and　the　most　touching　tenderness。　〃He　has　some　great　secret　that　he　wants　to　discover；　and　he　is　afraid　he　will　die　without　having　had　the　chance。〃

〃You　will　love　me　if　I　make　your　father　happy？〃

He　knew　it　was　the　question　of　a　fool；　but　he　so　longed　to　hear　from　her　lips　some　word　to　give　him　hope　that　he　could　not　help　asking　it。　　She　said：

〃Love　you　asas　you　seem　to　love　me？　　Not　that　same　way。　　I　don't　feel　that　way　toward　you。　　But　I　will　love　you　in　my　own　way。〃

He　observed　her　with　penetrating　eyes。　　Was　this　speech　of　hers　innocence　or　calculation？　　He　could　get　no　clue　to　the　truth。　　He　saw　nothing　but　innocence；　the　teaching　of　experience　warned　him　to　believe　in　nothing　but　guile。　　He　hid　his　doubt　and　chagrin　behind　a　mocking　smile。　　〃As　you　please；〃　said　he。　　〃I　will　do　my　part。　　Thenwe'll　see。　。　。　。　　Do　you　care　about　anyone　elsein　MY　way　of　loving；　I　mean？〃

It　was　again　the　question　of　an　infatuated　fool；　and　put　in　an　infatuated　fool's　way。　　For；　if　she　were　a　〃deep　one；〃　how　could　he　hope　to　get　the　truth？　　But　her　answer　reassured　him。　　〃No；〃　she　saidher　simple；　direct　negation　that　had　a　convincing　power　he　had　never　seen　equaled。

〃If　I　ever　knew　of　another　man's　touching　you；〃　he　said；　〃I'd　feel　like　strangling　him。〃　　He　laughed　at　himself。　　〃Not　that　I　should　strangle　him。　　That　sort　of　thing　isn't　done　any　more。　　But　I'd　do　something　devilish。〃

〃But　I　haven't　promised　not　to　kiss　anyone　else；〃　she　said。　　〃Why　should　I？　　I　don't　love　you。〃

He　looked　at　her　strangely。　　〃But　you're　going　to　love　me；〃　he　said。

She　shrank　within　herself　again。　　She　looked　at　him　with　uneasy　eyes。　　〃You　won't　kiss　me　any　more　until　I　tell　you　that　I　do　love　you？〃　she　asked　with　the　gravity　and　pathos　and　helplessness　of　a　child。

〃Don't　you　want　to　learn　to　love　me？to　learn　to　love？〃

She　was　silenta　silence　that　maddened　him。

〃Don't　be　afraid　to　speak；〃　he　said　irritably。　〃What　are　you　thinking？〃

〃That　I　don't　want　you　to　kiss　meand　that　I　do　want　father　to　be　happy。〃

Was　this　guile？　　Was　it　innocence？　　He　put　his　arms　round　her。　　〃Look　at　me；〃　he　said。

She　gazed　at　him　frankly。

〃You　like　me？〃

〃Yes。〃

〃Why　don't　you　want　me　to　kiss　you？〃

〃I　don't　know。　　It　makes　medislike　you。〃

He　released　her。　　She　laid　her　hand　on　his　arm　eagerly。　　〃Please〃　she　implored。　　〃I　don't　mean　to　hurt　you。　　I　wouldn't　offend　you　for　anything。　　Only　when　you　ask　me　a　questionmustn't　I　tell　you　the　truth？〃

〃Always；〃　he　said；　believing　in　her；　in　spite　of　the　warnings　of　cynical　worldliness。　　〃I　don't　know　whether　you　are　sincere　or　notas　yet。　　So　for　the　present　I'll　give　you　the　benefit　of　the　doubt。〃　　He　stood　back　and　looked　at　her　from　head　to　foot。　　〃You　are　beautiful！　perfect；〃　he　said　in　a　low　voice。　　He　laughed。　〃I'll　resist　the　temptation　to　kiss　you　again。　　I　must　go　now。　　About　your　fatherI'll　see　what　can　be　done。〃

She　stood　with　her　hands　behind　her　back；　looking　up　at　him　with　an　expression　he　could　not　fathom。　　Suddenly　she　advanced；　put　up　her　lips　and　said　gravely；

〃Won't　you　kiss　me？〃

He　eyed　her　quizzically。　　〃Ohyou've　changed　your　mind？　〃

She　shook　her　head。

〃Then　why　do　you　ask　me　to　kiss　you？　〃

〃Because　of　what　you　said　about　father。〃

He　laughed　and　kissed　her。　　And　then　she；　too；　laughed。　　He　said；　〃Not　for　my　own　sakenot　a　little　bit？〃

〃Oh；　yes；〃　she　cried；　〃when　you　kiss　me　that　way。　I　like　to　be　kissed。　　I　am　very　affectionate。〃

He　laughed　again。　　〃You　ARE　a　queer　one。　　If　it's　a　game；　it's　a　good　one。　　Is　it　a　game？〃

〃I　don't　know；〃　said　she　gayly。　　〃Good　night。　This　is　dreadfully　late　for　me。〃

〃Good　night；〃　he　said；　and　they　shook　hands。　　〃Do　you　like　me　betteror　less？〃

〃Better；〃　was　her　prompt；　apparently　honest　reply。

〃Curiously　enough；　I'm　beginning　to　LIKE　you；〃　said　he。　　〃Now　don't　ask　me　what　I　mean　by　that。　If　you　don't　know　already；　you'll　not　find　out　from　me。〃

〃Oh；　but　I　do　know；〃　cried　she。　　〃The　way　you　kissed　methat　was　one　thing。　　The　way　you　feel　toward　me　nowthat's　a　different　thing。　　Isn't　it　so？〃

〃Exactly。　　I　see　we　are　going　to　get　on。〃

〃Yes；　indeed。〃

They　shook　hands　again　in　f