honorine-第5节

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reached　me。　Finally；　he　would　give　utterance　to　harrowing　aspirations
for　happiness；　and　it　seemed　to　me　he　ought　yet　to　be　happy；　but　what
was　the　obstacle？　Was　there　a　woman　he　loved？　This　was　a　question　I
asked　myself。　You　may　imagine　the　extent　of　the　circles　of　torment
that　my　mind　had　searched　before　coming　to　so　simple　and　so　terrible　a
question。　Notwithstanding　his　efforts；　my　patron　did　not　succeed　in
stifling　the　movements　of　his　heart。　Under　his　austere　manner；　under
the　reserve　of　the　magistrate；　a　passion　rebelled；　though　coerced　with
such　force　that　no　one　but　I　who　lived　with　him　ever　guessed　the
secret。　His　motto　seemed　to　be；　'I　suffer；　and　am　silent。'　The　escort
of　respect　and　admiration　which　attended　him；　the　friendship　of
workers　as　valiant　as　himselfGrandville　and　Serizy；　both　presiding
judgeshad　no　hold　over　the　Count：　either　he　told　them　nothing；　or
they　knew　all。　Impassible　and　lofty　in　public；　the　Count　betrayed　the
man　only　on　rare　intervals　when；　alone　in　his　garden　or　his　study；　he
supposed　himself　unobserved；　but　then　he　was　a　child　again；　he　gave
course　to　the　tears　hidden　beneath　the　toga；　to　the　excitement　which；
if　wrongly　interpreted；　might　have　damaged　his　credit　for　perspicacity
as　a　statesman。

〃When　all　this　had　become　to　me　a　matter　of　certainty；　Comte　Octave
had　all　the　attractions　of　a　problem；　and　won　on　my　affection　as　much
as　though　he　had　been　my　own　father。　Can　you　enter　into　the　feeling　of
curiosity；　tempered　by　respect？　What　catastrophe　had　blasted　this
learned　man；　who；　like　Pitt；　had　devoted　himself　from　the　age　of
eighteen　to　the　studies　indispensable　to　power；　while　he　had　no
ambition；　this　judge；　who　thoroughly　knew　the　law　of　nations；
political　law；　civil　and　criminal　law；　and　who　could　find　in　these　a
weapon　against　every　anxiety；　against　every　mistake；　this　profound
legislator；　this　serious　writer；　this　pious　celibate　whose　life
sufficiently　proved　that　he　was　open　to　no　reproach？　A　criminal　could
not　have　been　more　hardly　punished　by　God　than　was　my　master；　sorrow
had　robbed　him　of　half　his　slumbers；　he　never　slept　more　than　four
hours。　What　struggle　was　it　that　went　on　in　the　depths　of　these　hours
apparently　so　calm；　so　studious；　passing　without　a　sound　or　a　murmur；
during　which　I　often　detected　him；　when　the　pen　had　dropped　from　his
fingers；　with　his　head　resting　on　one　hand；　his　eyes　like　two　fixed
stars；　and　sometimes　wet　with　tears？　How　could　the　waters　of　that
living　spring　flow　over　the　burning　strand　without　being　dried　up　by
the　subterranean　fire？　Was　there　below　it；　as　there　is　under　the　sea；
between　it　and　the　central　fires　of　the　globe；　a　bed　of　granite？　And
would　the　volcano　burst　at　last？

〃Sometimes　the　Count　would　give　me　a　look　of　that　sagacious　and　keen…
eyed　curiosity　by　which　one　man　searches　another　when　he　desires　an
accomplice；　then　he　shunned　my　eye　as　he　saw　it　open　a　mouth；　so　to
speak；　insisting　on　a　reply；　and　seeming　to　say；　'Speak　first！'　Now
and　then　Comte　Octave's　melancholy　was　surly　and　gruff。　If　these
spurts　of　temper　offended　me；　he　could　get　over　it　without　thinking　of
asking　my　pardon；　but　then　his　manners　were　gracious　to　the　point　of
Christian　humility。

〃When　I　became　attached　like　a　son　to　this　manto　me　such　a　mystery；
but　so　intelligible　to　the　outer　world；　to　whom　the　epithet　eccentric
is　enough　to　account　for　all　the　enigmas　of　the　heartI　changed　the
state　of　the　house。　Neglect　of　his　own　interests　was　carried　by　the
Count　to　the　length　of　folly　in　the　management　of　his　affairs。
Possessing　an　income　of　about　a　hundred　and　sixty　thousand　francs；
without　including　the　emoluments　of　his　appointmentsthree　of　which
did　not　come　under　the　law　against　pluralityhe　spent　sixty　thousand；
of　which　at　least　thirty　thousand　went　to　his　servants。　By　the　end　of
the　first　year　I　had　got　rid　of　all　these　rascals；　and　begged　His
Excellency　to　use　his　influence　in　helping　me　to　get　honest　servants。
By　the　end　of　the　second　year　the　Count；　better　fed　and　better　served；
enjoyed　the　comforts　of　modern　life；　he　had　fine　horses；　supplied　by　a
coachman　to　whom　I　paid　so　much　a　month　for　each　horse；　his　dinners　on
his　reception　days；　furnished　by　Chevet　at　a　price　agreed　upon；　did
him　credit；　his　daily　meals　were　prepared　by　an　excellent　cook　found
by　my　uncle；　and　helped　by　two　kitchenmaids。　The　expenditure　for
housekeeping；　not　including　purchases；　was　no　more　than　thirty
thousand　francs　a　year；　we　had　two　additional　men…servants；　whose　care
restored　the　poetical　aspect　of　the　house；　for　this　old　palace；
splendid　even　in　its　rust；　had　an　air　of　dignity　which　neglect　had
dishonored。

〃　'I　am　no　longer　astonished；'　said　he；　on　hearing　of　these　results；
'at　the　fortunes　made　by　servants。　In　seven　years　I　have　had　two
cooks；　who　have　become　rich　restaurant…keepers。'

〃Early　in　the　year　1826　the　Count　had；　no　doubt；　ceased　to　watch　me；
and　we　were　as　closely　attached　as　two　men　can　be　when　one　is
subordinate　to　the　other。　He　had　never　spoken　to　me　of　my　future
prospects；　but　he　had　taken　an　interest；　both　as　a　master　and　as　a
father；　in　training　me。　He　often　required　me　to　collect　materials　for
his　most　arduous　labors；　I　drew　up　some　of　his　reports；　and　he
corrected　them；　showing　the　difference　between　his　interpretation　of
the　law；　his　views　and　mine。　When　at　last　I　had　produced　a　document
which　he　could　give　in　as　his　own　he　was　delighted；　this　satisfaction
was　my　reward；　and　he　could　see　that　I　took　it　so。　This　little
incident　produced　an　extraordinary　effect　on　a　soul　which　seemed　so
stern。　The　Count　pronounced　sentence　on　me；　to　use　a　legal　phrase；　as
supreme　and　royal　judge；　he　took　my　head　in　his　hands；　and　kissed　me
on　the　forehead。

〃　'Maurice；'　he　exclaimed；　'you　are　no　longer　my　apprentice；　I　know
not　yet　what　you　will　be　to　mebut　if　no　change　occurs　in　my　life；
perhaps　you　will　take　the　place　of　a　son。'

〃Comte　Octave　had　introduced　me　to　the　best　houses　in　Paris；　whither　I
went　in　his　stead；　with　his　servants　and　carriage；　on　the　too　frequent
occasions　when；　on　the　point　of　starting；　he　changed　his　mind；　and
sent　for　a　hackney　cab　to　take　himWhere？that　was　the　mystery。　By
the　welcome　I　met　with　I　could　judge　of　the　Count's　feelings　towards
me；　and　the　earnestness　of　his　recommendations。　He　supplied　all　my
wants　with　the　thoughtfulness　of　a　father；　and　with　all　the　greater
liberality　because　my　modesty　left　it　to　him　always　to　think　of　me。
Towards　the　end　of　January　1827；　at　the　house　of　the　Comtesse　de
Serizy；　I　had　such　persistent　ill…luck　at　play　that　I　lost　two
thousand　francs；　and　I　would　not　draw　them　out　of　my　savings。　Next
morning　I　asked　myself；　'Had　I　better　ask　my　uncle　for　the　money；　or
put　my　confidence　in　the　Count？'

〃I　decided　on　the　second　alternative。

〃　'Yesterday；'　said　I；　when　he　was　at　breakfast；　'I　lost　persistently
at　play；　I　was　provoked；　and　went　on；　I　owe　two　thousand　francs。　Will
you　allow　me　to　draw　the　sum　on　account　of　my　year's　salary？'

〃　'No；'　said　he；　with　the　sweetest　smile；　'when　a　man　plays　in
society；　he　must　have　a　gambling　purse。　Draw　six　thousand　francs；　pay
your　debts。　Henceforth　we　must　go　halves；　for　since　you　are　my
representative　on　most　occasions；　your　self…respect　must　not　be　made
to　suffer　for　it。'

〃I　made　no　speech　of　thanks。　Thanks　would　have　been　superfluous
between　us。　This　shade　shows　the　character　of　our　relations。　And　yet
we　had　not　yet　unlimited　confidence　in　each　other；　he　did　not　open　to
me　the　vast　subterranean　chambers　which　I　had　detected　in　his　secret
life；　and　I；　for　my　part；　never　said　to　him；　'What　ails　you？　From　what
are　you　suffering？'

〃What　could　he　be　doing　during　those　long　evenings？　He　would　often
come　in　on　foot　or　in　a　hackney　cab　when　I　returned　in　a　carriageI；
his　secretary！　Was　so　pious　a　man　a　prey　to　vices　hidden　under
hypocrisy？　Did　he　expend　all　the　powers　of　his　mind　to　satisfy　a
jealousy　more　dexterous　than　Othello's？　Did　he　live　with　some　woman
unworthy　of　him？　One　morning；　on　returning　from　I　have　forgotten　what
shop；　where　I　had　just　paid　a　bill；　between　the　Church　of　Saint…Paul
and　the　Hotel　de　Ville；　I　came　across　Comte　Octave　in　such　eager
conversation　with　an　old　woman　that　he　did　not　see　me。　The　appearance
of　this　hag　filled　me　with　strange　suspicions；　suspicions　that　were
all　the　better　founded　because　I　never　found　that　the　Count　invested
his　savings。　Is　it　not　shocking　to　think　of？　I　was　constituting　myself
my　patron's　censor。　At　that　time　I　knew　that　he　had　more　than　six
hundred　thousand　francs　to　invest；　and　if　he　had　bought　securities　of
any　kind；　his　confidence　in　me　was　so　complete　in　all　that　concerned
his　pecuniary　interests；　that　I　certainly　should　have　known　it。

〃Sometimes；　in　the　morning；　the　Count　took　exercise　in　his　garden；　to
and　fro；　like　a　man　to　whom　a　walk　is　the　hippogryph　ridden　by　dreamy
melancholy。　He　walked　and　walked！　And　he　rubbed　his　hands　enough　to
rub　the　skin　off。　And　then；　if　I　met　him　unexpectedly　as　he　came　to
the　angle　of　a　path；　I　saw　his　face　beaming。　His　eyes；　instead　of　the
hardness　of　a　turquoise；　had　that　velvety　softness　of　the　blue
periwinkle；　which　had　so　much　struc