the way of all flesh-第24节

按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页，按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页，按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部！
————未阅读完？加入书签已便下次继续阅读！


had　thought　there　was　the　slightest　chance　of　my　being　heard　I
should　have　prayed　that　some　one　might　ere　long　treat　him　as　he　had
treated　Ernest。

Then　my　thoughts　wandered　on　to　those　calculations　which　people　make
about　waste　of　time　and　how　much　one　can　get　done　if　one　gives　ten
minutes　a　day　to　it；　and　I　was　thinking　what　improper　suggestion　I
could　make　in　connection　with　this　and　the　time　spent　on　family
prayers　which　should　at　the　same　time　be　just　tolerable；　when　I
heard　Theobald　beginning　〃The　grace　of　our　Lord　Jesus　Christ〃　and　in
a　few　seconds　the　ceremony　was　over；　and　the　servants　filed　out
again　as　they　had　filed　in。

As　soon　as　they　had　left　the　drawing…room；　Christina；　who　was　a
little　ashamed　of　the　transaction　to　which　I　had　been　a　witness；
imprudently　returned　to　it；　and　began　to　justify　it；　saying　that　it
cut　her　to　the　heart；　and　that　it　cut　Theobald　to　the　heart　and　a
good　deal　more；　but　that　〃it　was　the　only　thing　to　be　done。〃

I　received　this　as　coldly　as　I　decently　could；　and　by　my　silence
during　the　rest　of　the　evening　showed　that　I　disapproved　of　what　I
had　seen。

Next　day　I　was　to　go　back　to　London；　but　before　I　went　I　said　I
should　like　to　take　some　new…laid　eggs　back　with　me；　so　Theobald
took　me　to　the　house　of　a　labourer　in　the　village　who　lived　a
stone's　throw　from　the　Rectory　as　being　likely　to　supply　me　with
them。　　Ernest；　for　some　reason　or　other；　was　allowed　to　come　too。　　I
think　the　hens　had　begun　to　sit；　but　at　any　rate　eggs　were　scarce；
and　the　cottager's　wife　could　not　find　me　more　than　seven　or　eight；
which　we　proceeded　to　wrap　up　in　separate　pieces　of　paper　so　that　I
might　take　them　to　town　safely。

This　operation　was　carried　on　upon　the　ground　in　front　of　the
cottage　door；　and　while　we　were　in　the　midst　of　it　the　cottager's
little　boy；　a　lad　much　about　Ernest's　age；　trod　upon　one　of　the　eggs
that　was　wrapped　up　in　paper　and　broke　it。

〃There　now；　Jack；〃　said　his　mother；　〃see　what　you've　done；　you've
broken　a　nice　egg　and　cost　me　a　pennyHere；　Emma；〃　she　added；
calling　her　daughter；　〃take　the　child　away；　there's　a　dear。〃

Emma　came　at　once；　and　walked　off　with　the　youngster；　taking　him　out
of　harm's　way。

〃Papa；〃　said　Ernest；　after　we　had　left　the　house；　〃Why　didn't　Mrs
Heaton　whip　Jack　when　he　trod　on　the　egg？〃

I　was　spiteful　enough　to　give　Theobald　a　grim　smile　which　said　as
plainly　as　words　could　have　done　that　I　thought　Ernest　had　hit　him
rather　hard。

Theobald　coloured　and　looked　angry。　　〃I　dare　say；〃　he　said　quickly；
〃that　his　mother　will　whip　him　now　that　we　are　gone。〃

I　was　not　going　to　have　this　and　said　I　did　not　believe　it；　and　so
the　matter　dropped；　but　Theobald　did　not　forget　it　and　my　visits　to
Battersby　were　henceforth　less　frequent。

On　our　return　to　the　house　we　found　the　postman　had　arrived　and　had
brought　a　letter　appointing　Theobald　to　a　rural　deanery　which　had
lately　fallen　vacant　by　the　death　of　one　of　the　neighbouring　clergy
who　had　held　the　office　for　many　years。　　The　bishop　wrote　to
Theobald　most　warmly；　and　assured　him　that　he　valued　him　as　among
the　most　hard…working　and　devoted　of　his　parochial　clergy。
Christina　of　course　was　delighted；　and　gave　me　to　understand　that　it
was　only　an　instalment　of　the　much　higher　dignities　which　were　in
store　for　Theobald　when　his　merits　were　more　widely　known。

I　did　not　then　foresee　how　closely　my　godson's　life　and　mine　were　in
after　years　to　be　bound　up　together；　if　I　had；　I　should　doubtless
have　looked　upon　him　with　different　eyes　and　noted　much　to　which　I
paid　no　attention　at　the　time。　　As　it　was；　I　was　glad　to　get　away
from　him；　for　I　could　do　nothing　for　him；　or　chose　to　say　that　I
could　not；　and　the　sight　of　so　much　suffering　was　painful　to　me。　　A
man　should　not　only　have　his　own　way　as　far　as　possible；　but　he
should　only　consort　with　things　that　are　getting　their　own　way　so
far　that　they　are　at　any　rate　comfortable。　　Unless　for　short　times
under　exceptional　circumstances；　he　should　not　even　see　things　that
have　been　stunted　or　starved；　much　less　should　he　eat　meat　that　has
been　vexed　by　having　been　over…driven　or　underfed；　or　afflicted　with
any　disease；　nor　should　he　touch　vegetables　that　have　not　been　well
grown。　　For　all　these　things　cross　a　man；　whatever　a　man　comes　in
contact　with　in　any　way　forms　a　cross　with　him　which　will　leave　him
better　or　worse；　and　the　better　things　he　is　crossed　with　the　more
likely　he　is　to　live　long　and　happily。　　All　things　must　be　crossed　a
little　or　they　would　cease　to　livebut　holy　things；　such　for
example　as　Giovanni　Bellini's　saints；　have　been　crossed　with　nothing
but　what　is　good　of　its　kind；



CHAPTER　XXIV



The　storm　which　I　have　described　in　the　previous　chapter　was　a
sample　of　those　that　occurred　daily　for　many　years。　　No　matter　how
clear　the　sky；　it　was　always　liable　to　cloud　over　now　in　one　quarter
now　in　another；　and　the　thunder　and　lightning　were　upon　the　young
people　before　they　knew　where　they　were。

〃And　then；　you　know；〃　said　Ernest　to　me；　when　I　asked　him　not　long
since　to　give　me　more　of　his　childish　reminiscences　for　the　benefit
of　my　story；　〃we　used　to　learn　Mrs　Barbauld's　hymns；　they　were　in
prose；　and　there　was　one　about　the　lion　which　began；　'Come；　and　I
will　show　you　what　is　strong。　　The　lion　is　strong；　when　he　raiseth
himself　from　his　lair；　when　he　shaketh　his　mane；　when　the　voice　of
his　roaring　is　heard　the　cattle　of　the　field　fly；　and　the　beasts　of
the　desert　hide　themselves；　for　he　is　very　terrible。'　　I　used　to　say
this　to　Joey　and　Charlotte　about　my　father　himself　when　I　got　a
little　older；　but　they　were　always　didactic；　and　said　it　was　naughty
of　me。

〃One　great　reason　why　clergymen's　households　are　generally　unhappy
is　because　the　clergyman　is　so　much　at　home　or　close　about　the
house。　　The　doctor　is　out　visiting　patients　half　his　time：　　the
lawyer　and　the　merchant　have　offices　away　from　home；　but　the
clergyman　has　no　official　place　of　business　which　shall　ensure　his
being　away　from　home　for　many　hours　together　at　stated　times。　　Our
great　days　were　when　my　father　went　for　a　day's　shopping　to
Gildenham。　　We　were　some　miles　from　this　place；　and　commissions　used
to　accumulate　on　my　father's　list　till　he　would　make　a　day　of　it　and
go　and　do　the　lot。　　As　soon　as　his　back　was　turned　the　air　felt
lighter；　as　soon　as　the　hall　door　opened　to　let　him　in　again；　the
law　with　its　all…reaching　'touch　not；　taste　not；　handle　not'　was
upon　us　again。　　The　worst　of　it　was　that　I　could　never　trust　Joey
and　Charlotte；　they　would　go　a　good　way　with　me　and　then　turn　back；
or　even　the　whole　way　and　then　their　consciences　would　compel　them
to　tell　papa　and　mamma。　　They　liked　running　with　the　hare　up　to　a
certain　point；　but　their　instinct　was　towards　the　hounds。

〃It　seems　to　me；〃　he　continued；　〃that　the　family　is　a　survival　of
the　principle　which　is　more　logically　embodied　in　the　compound
animaland　the　compound　animal　is　a　form　of　life　which　has　been
found　incompatible　with　high　development。　　I　would　do　with　the
family　among　mankind　what　nature　has　done　with　the　compound　animal；
and　confine　it　to　the　lower　and　less　progressive　races。　　Certainly
there　is　no　inherent　love　for　the　family　system　on　the　part　of
nature　herself。　　Poll　the　forms　of　life　and　you　will　find　it　in　a
ridiculously　small　minority。　　The　fishes　know　it　not；　and　they　get
along　quite　nicely。　　The　ants　and　the　bees；　who　far　outnumber　man；
sting　their　fathers　to　death　as　a　matter　of　course；　and　are　given　to
the　atrocious　mutilation　of　nine…tenths　of　the　offspring　committed
to　their　charge；　yet　where　shall　we　find　communities　more
universally　respected？　　Take　the　cuckoo　againis　there　any　bird
which　we　like　better？〃

I　saw　he　was　running　off　from　his　own　reminiscences　and　tried　to
bring　him　back　to　them；　but　it　was　no　use。

〃What　a　fool；〃　he　said；　〃a　man　is　to　remember　anything　that　happened
more　than　a　week　ago　unless　it　was　pleasant；　or　unless　he　wants　to
make　some　use　of　it。

〃Sensible　people　get　the　greater　part　of　their　own　dying　done　during
their　own　lifetime。　　A　man　at　five　and　thirty　should　no　more　regret
not　having　had　a　happier　childhood　than　he　should　regret　not　having
been　born　a　prince　of　the　blood。　　He　might　be　happier　if　he　had　been
more　fortunate　in　childhood；　but；　for　aught　he　knows；　if　he　had；
something　else　might　have　happened　which　might　have　killed　him　long
ago。　　If　I　had　to　be　born　again　I　would　be　born　at　Battersby　of　the
same　father　and　mother　as　before；　and　I　would　not　alter　anything
that　has　ever　happened　to　me。〃

The　most　amusing　incident　that　I　can　remember　about　his　childhood
was　that　when　he　was　about　seven　years　old　he　told　me　he　was　going
to　have　a　natural　child。　　I　asked　him　his　reasons　for　thinking　this；
and　he　explained　that　papa　and　mamma　had　always　told　him　that　nobody
had　children　till　they　were　married；　and　as　long　as　he　had　believed
this　of　course　he　had　had　no　idea　of　having　a　child；　till　he　was
grown　up；　but　not　long　since　he　had　been　reading　Mrs　Markham's
history　of　England　and　had　come　upon　the　words　〃John　of　Gaunt　had
several　natural　children〃　he　had　therefore　asked　his　governess　what
a　natural　child　waswere　not　al