the way of all flesh-第17节

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parish　management　should　arise？　　Who　such　a　happy　mixture　of　the
sincere　uninquiring　Christian　and　of　the　man　of　the　world？　　For　so
people　actually　called　him。　　They　said　he　was　such　an　admirable　man
of　business。　　Certainly　if　he　had　said　he　would　pay　a　sum　of　money
at　a　certain　time；　the　money　would　be　forthcoming　on　the　appointed
day；　and　this　is　saying　a　good　deal　for　any　man。　　His　constitutional
timidity　rendered　him　incapable　of　an　attempt　to　overreach　when
there　was　the　remotest　chance　of　opposition　or　publicity；　and　his
correct　bearing　and　somewhat　stern　expression　were　a　great
protection　to　him　against　being　overreached。　　He　never　talked　of
money；　and　invariably　changed　the　subject　whenever　money　was
introduced。　　His　expression　of　unutterable　horror　at　all　kinds　of
meanness　was　a　sufficient　guarantee　that　he　was　not　mean　himself。
Besides　he　had　no　business　transactions　save　of　the　most　ordinary
butcher's　book　and　baker's　book　description。　　His　tastesif　he　had
anywere；　as　we　have　seen；　simple；　he　had　900　pounds　a　year　and　a
house；　the　neighbourhood　was　cheap；　and　for　some　time　he　had　no
children　to　be　a　drag　upon　him。　　Who　was　not　to　be　envied；　and　if
envied　why　then　respected；　if　Theobald　was　not　enviable？

Yet　I　imagine　that　Christina　was　on　the　whole　happier　than　her
husband。　　She　had　not　to　go　and　visit　sick　parishioners；　and　the
management　of　her　house　and　the　keeping　of　her　accounts　afforded　as
much　occupation　as　she　desired。　　Her　principal　duty　was；　as　she　well
said；　to　her　husbandto　love　him；　honour　him；　and　keep　him　in　a
good　temper。　　To　do　her　justice　she　fulfilled　this　duty　to　the
uttermost　of　her　power。　　It　would　have　been　better　perhaps　if　she
had　not　so　frequently　assured　her　husband　that　he　was　the　best　and
wisest　of　mankind；　for　no　one　in　his　little　world　ever　dreamed　of
telling　him　anything　else；　and　it　was　not　long　before　he　ceased　to
have　any　doubt　upon　the　matter。　　As　for　his　temper；　which　had　become
very　violent　at　times；　she　took　care　to　humour　it　on　the　slightest
sign　of　an　approaching　outbreak。　　She　had　early　found　that　this　was
much　the　easiest　plan。　　The　thunder　was　seldom　for　herself。　　Long
before　her　marriage　even　she　had　studied　his　little　ways；　and　knew
how　to　add　fuel　to　the　fire　as　long　as　the　fire　seemed　to　want　it；
and　then　to　damp　it　judiciously　down；　making　as　little　smoke　as
possible。

In　money　matters　she　was　scrupulousness　itself。　　Theobald　made　her　a
quarterly　allowance　for　her　dress；　pocket　money　and　little　charities
and　presents。　　In　these　last　items　she　was　liberal　in　proportion　to
her　income；　indeed　she　dressed　with　great　economy　and　gave　away
whatever　was　over　in　presents　or　charity。　　Oh；　what　a　comfort　it　was
to　Theobald　to　reflect　that　he　had　a　wife　on　whom　he　could　rely
never　to　cost　him　a　sixpence　of　unauthorised　expenditure！　　Letting
alone　her　absolute　submission；　the　perfect　coincidence　of　her
opinion　with　his　own　upon　every　subject　and　her　constant　assurances
to　him　that　he　was　right　in　everything　which　he　took　it　into　his
head　to　say　or　do；　what　a　tower　of　strength　to　him　was　her　exactness
in　money　matters！　　As　years　went　by　he　became　as　fond　of　his　wife　as
it　was　in　his　nature　to　be　of　any　living　thing；　and　applauded
himself　for　having　stuck　to　his　engagementa　piece　of　virtue　of
which　he　was　now　reaping　the　reward。　　Even　when　Christina　did　outrun
her　quarterly　stipend　by　some　thirty　shillings　or　a　couple　of
pounds；　it　was　always　made　perfectly　clear　to　Theobald　how　the
deficiency　had　arisenthere　had　been　an　unusually　costly　evening
dress　bought　which　was　to　last　a　long　time；　or　somebody's　unexpected
wedding　had　necessitated　a　more　handsome　present　than　the　quarter's
balance　would　quite　allow：　　the　excess　of　expenditure　was　always
repaid　in　the　following　quarter　or　quarters　even　though　it　were　only
ten　shillings　at　a　time。

I　believe；　however；　that　after　they　had　been　married　some　twenty
years；　Christina　had　somewhat　fallen　from　her　original　perfection　as
regards　money。　　She　had　got　gradually　in　arrear　during　many
successive　quarters；　till　she　had　contracted　a　chronic　loan　a　sort
of　domestic　national　debt；　amounting　to　between　seven　and　eight
pounds。　　Theobald　at　length　felt　that　a　remonstrance　had　become
imperative；　and　took　advantage　of　his　silver　wedding　day　to　inform
Christina　that　her　indebtedness　was　cancelled；　and　at　the　same　time
to　beg　that　she　would　endeavour　henceforth　to　equalise　her
expenditure　and　her　income。　　She　burst　into　tears　of　love　and
gratitude；　assured　him　that　he　was　the　best　and　most　generous　of
men；　and　never　during　the　remainder　of　her　married　life　was　she　a
single　shilling　behind　hand。

Christina　hated　change　of　all　sorts　no　less　cordially　than　her
husband。　　She　and　Theobald　had　nearly　everything　in　this　world　that
they　could　wish　for；　why；　then；　should　people　desire　to　introduce
all　sorts　of　changes　of　which　no　one　could　foresee　the　end？
Religion；　she　was　deeply　convinced；　had　long　since　attained　its
final　development；　nor　could　it　enter　into　the　heart　of　reasonable
man　to　conceive　any　faith　more　perfect　than　was　inculcated　by　the
Church　of　England。　　She　could　imagine　no　position　more　honourable
than　that　of　a　clergyman's　wife　unless　indeed　it　were　a　bishop's。
Considering　his　father's　influence　it　was　not　at　all　impossible　that
Theobald　might　be　a　bishop　some　dayand　thenthen　would　occur　to
her　that　one　little　flaw　in　the　practice　of　the　Church　of　Englanda
flaw　not　indeed　in　its　doctrine；　but　in　its　policy；　which　she
believed　on　the　whole　to　be　a　mistaken　one　in　this　respect。　　I　mean
the　fact　that　a　bishop's　wife　does　not　take　the　rank　of　her　husband。

This　had　been　the　doing　of　Elizabeth；　who　had　been　a　bad　woman；　of
exceeding　doubtful　moral　character；　and　at　heart　a　Papist　to　the
last。　　Perhaps　people　ought　to　have　been　above　mere　considerations
of　worldly　dignity；　but　the　world　was　as　it　was；　and　such　things
carried　weight　with　them；　whether　they　ought　to　do　so　or　no。　　Her
influence　as　plain　Mrs　Pontifex；　wife；　we　will　say；　of　the　Bishop　of
Winchester；　would　no　doubt　be　considerable。　　Such　a　character　as
hers　could　not　fail　to　carry　weight　if　she　were　ever　in　a
sufficiently　conspicuous　sphere　for　its　influence　to　be　widely　felt；
but　as　Lady　Winchesteror　the　Bishopesswhich　would　sound　quite
nicelywho　could　doubt　that　her　power　for　good　would　be　enhanced？
And　it　would　be　all　the　nicer　because　if　she　had　a　daughter　the
daughter　would　not　be　a　Bishopess　unless　indeed　she　were　to　marry　a
Bishop　too；　which　would　not　be　likely。

These　were　her　thoughts　upon　her　good　days；　at　other　times　she
would；　to　do　her　justice；　have　doubts　whether　she　was　in　all
respects　as　spiritually　minded　as　she　ought　to　be。　　She　must　press
on；　press　on；　till　every　enemy　to　her　salvation　was　surmounted　and
Satan　himself　lay　bruised　under　her　feet。　　It　occurred　to　her　on　one
of　these　occasions　that　she　might　steal　a　march　over　some　of　her
contemporaries　if　she　were　to　leave　off　eating　black　puddings；　of
which　whenever　they　had　killed　a　pig　she　had　hitherto　partaken
freely；　and　if　she　were　also　careful　that　no　fowls　were　served　at
her　table　which　had　had　their　necks　wrung；　but　only　such　as　had　had
their　throats　cut　and　been　allowed　to　bleed。　　St　Paul　and　the　Church
of　Jerusalem　had　insisted　upon　it　as　necessary　that　even　Gentile
converts　should　abstain　from　things　strangled　and　from　blood；　and
they　had　joined　this　prohibition　with　that　of　a　vice　about　the
abominable　nature　of　which　there　could　be　no　question；　it　would　be
well　therefore　to　abstain　in　future　and　see　whether　any　noteworthy
spiritual　result　ensued。　　She　did　abstain；　and　was　certain　that　from
the　day　of　her　resolve　she　had　felt　stronger；　purer　in　heart；　and　in
all　respects　more　spiritually　minded　than　she　had　ever　felt
hitherto。　　Theobald　did　not　lay　so　much　stress　on　this　as　she　did；
but　as　she　settled　what　he　should　have　at　dinner　she　could　take　care
that　he　got　no　strangled　fowls；　as　for　black　puddings；　happily；　he
had　seen　them　made　when　he　was　a　boy；　and　had　never　got　over　his
aversion　for　them。　　She　wished　the　matter　were　one　of　more　general
observance　than　it　was；　this　was　just　a　case　in　which　as　Lady
Winchester　she　might　have　been　able　to　do　what　as　plain　Mrs　Pontifex
it　was　hopeless　even　to　attempt。

And　thus　this　worthy　couple　jogged　on　from　month　to　month　and　from
year　to　year。　　The　reader；　if　he　has　passed　middle　life　and　has　a
clerical　connection；　will　probably　remember　scores　and　scores　of
rectors　and　rectors'　wives　who　differed　in　no　material　respect　from
Theobald　and　Christina。　　Speaking　from　a　recollection　and　experience
extending　over　nearly　eighty　years　from　the　time　when　I　was　myself　a
child　in　the　nursery　of　a　vicarage；　I　should　say　I　had　drawn　the
better　rather　than　the　worse　side　of　the　life　of　an　English　country
parson　of　some　fifty　years　ago。　　I　admit；　however；　that　there　are　no
such　people　to　be　found　nowadays。　　A　more　united　or；　on　the　whole；
happier；　couple　could　not　have　been　found　in　England。　　One　grief
only　overshadowed　the　early　years　of　their　married　life：　　I　mean　the
fact　that　no　living　children　were　born　to　them。



CHAPTER　XVII



I