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The Woman…Haters

by Joseph C。 Lincoln







FOREWORD

(By Way of Explanation)

A story of mine called; like this; 〃The Woman…Haters;〃 appeared
recently in one of the magazines。  That story was not this one;
except in partthe part dealing with 〃John Brown〃 and Miss Ruth
Graham。  Readers of the former tale who perhaps imagine they know
all about Seth Atkins and Mrs。 Emeline Bascom will be surprised to
find they really know so little。  The truth is that; when I began to
revise and rearrange the magazine story for publication as a book;
new ideas came; grew; and developed。  I discovered that I had been
misinformed concerning the lightkeeper's past and present relations
with the housekeeper at the bungalow。  And there was 〃Bennie D。〃
whom I had overlooked; had not mentioned at all; and that
rejuvenated craft; the Daisy M。; and the high tide which is; or
should be; talked about in Eastboro even yet; all these I had
omitted for the very good reason that I never knew of them。  I have
tried to be more careful this time。  During the revising process
〃The Woman…Haters〃 has more than doubled in length and; let us hope;
in accuracy。  Even now it is; of course; not a novel; but merely a
summer farce…comedy; a 〃yarn。〃  And this; by the way; is all that it
pretends to be。

JOSEPH C。 LINCOLN。

May; 1911。



CONTENTS

CHAPTER

I。MR。 SETH ATKINS

II。MR。 JOHN BROWN

III。MR。 BROWN PUTS IN AN APPLICATION

IV。THE COMING OF JOB

V。THE GOING OF JOSHUA

VI。THE PICNIC

VII。OUT OF THE BAG

VIII。NEIGHBORS AND WASPS

IX。THE BUNGALOW GIRL

X。THE BUNGALOW WOMAN

XI。BEHIND THE SAND DUNE

XII。THE LETTER AND THE 'PHONE

XIII。〃JOHN BROWN〃 CHANGES HIS NAME

XIV。〃BENNIE D。〃

XV。THE VOYAGE OF THE Daisy M。

XVI。THE EBB TIDE

XVII。WOMAN…HATERS



THE WOMAN…HATERS


CHAPTER I

MR。 SETH ATKINS


The stars; like incandescent lights fed by a fast weakening dynamo;
grew pale; faded; and; one by one; went out。  The slate…colored sea;
with its tumbling waves; changed color; becoming a light gray; then
a faint blue; and; as the red sun rolled up over the edge of the
eastern horizon; a brilliant sapphire; trimmed with a silver white
on the shoals and along the beach at the foot of the bluff。

Seth Atkins; keeper of the Eastboro Twin…Lights; yawned; stretched;
and glanced through the seaward windows of the octagon…shaped;
glass…enclosed room at the top of the north tower; where he had
spent the night just passed。  Then he rose from his chair and
extinguished the blaze in the great lantern beside him。  Morning had
come; the mists had rolled away; and the dots scattered along the
horizonschooners; tugs; and coal barges; for the most partno
longer needed the glare of Eastboro Twin…Lights to warn them against
close proximity to the dangerous; shoal…bordered coast。  Incidentally;
it was no longer necessary for Mr。 Atkins to remain on watch。  He
drew the curtains over the polished glass and brass of the lantern;
yawned again; and descended the winding iron stairs to the door at
the foot of the tower; opened it and emerged into the sandy yard。

Crossing this yard; before the small white house which the
government provided as a dwelling place for its lightkeepers; he
opened the door of the south tower; mounted the stairs there and
repeated the extinguishing process with the other lantern。  Before
again descending to earth; however; he stepped out on the iron
balcony surrounding the light chamber and looked about him。

The view; such as it was; was extensive。  To the east the open sea;
the wide Atlantic; rolling lazily in the morning light; a faint
breeze rippling the surfaces of the ground…swell。  A few sails in
sight; far out。  Not a sound except the hiss and splash of the surf;
which; because of a week of calms and light winds; was low even for
that time of yearearly June。

To the north stretched the shores of the back of the Cape。  High
clay bluffs; rain…washed and wrinkled; sloping sharply to the white
sand of the beach a hundred feet below。  Only one building; except
those connected with the lighthouses; near at hand; this a small;
gray…shingled bungalow about two hundred yards away; separated from
the lights by the narrow stream called Clam CreekSeth always spoke
of it as the 〃Crick〃which; turning in behind the long surf…beaten
sandspit known; for some forgotten reason; as 〃Black Man's Point;〃
continued to the salt…water pond which was named 〃The Cove。〃  A path
led down from the lighthouses to a bend in the 〃Crick;〃 and there;
on a small wharf; was a shanty where Seth kept his spare lobster and
eel…pots; dory sails; nets; and the like。  The dory itself; with the
oars in her; was moored in the cove。

A mile off; to the south; the line of bluffs was broken by another
inlet; the entrance to Pounddug Slough。  This poetically named
channel twisted and wound tortuously inland through salt marshes and
between mudbanks; widening at last to become Eastboro Back Harbor; a
good…sized body of water; with the village of Eastboro at its upper
end。  In the old days; when Eastboro amounted to something as a
fishing port; the mackerel fleet unloaded its catch at the wharves
in the Back Harbor。  Then Pounddug Slough was kept thoroughly
dredged and buoyed。  Now it was weed…grown and neglected。  Only an
occasional lobsterman's dory traversed its winding ways; which the
storms and tides of each succeeding winter rendered more difficult
to navigate。  The abandoned fish houses along its shores were
falling to pieces; and at intervals the stranded hulk of a fishing
sloop or a little schooner; rotting in the sun; was a dismal
reminder that Eastboro's ambitious young men no longer got their
living alongshore。  The town itself had gone to sleep; awakening
only in the summer; when the few cottagers came and the Bay Side
Hotel was opened for its short season。

Behind the lighthouse buildings; to the westand in the direction
of the villagewere five miles of nothing in particular。  A
desolate wilderness of rolling sand…dunes; beach grass; huckleberry
and bayberry bushes; cedar swamps; and small clumps of pitch…pines。
Through this desert the three or four rutted; crooked sand roads;
leading to and from the lights; turned and twisted。  Along their
borders dwelt no human being; but life was there; life in abundance。
Ezra Payne; late assistant keeper at the Twin…Lights; was ready at
all times to furnish evidence concerning the existence of this life。

〃My godfreys domino!〃 Ezra had exclaimed; after returning from a
drive to Eastboro village; 〃I give you my word; Seth; they dummed
nigh et me alive。  They covered the horse all up; so that he looked
for all the world like a sheep; woolly。  I don't mind moskeeters in
moderation; but when they roost on my eyelids and make 'em so heavy
I can't open 'em; then I'm ready to swear。  But I couldn't get even
that relief; because every time I unbattened my mouth a million or
so flew in and choked me。  That's what I saida million。  Some
moskeeters are fat; but these don't get a square meal often enough
to be anything but hide…racks filled with cussedness。  Moskeeters!
My godfreys domino!〃

Ezra was no longer assistant lightkeeper。  He and his superior had
quarreled two days before。  The quarrel was the culmination; on
Ezra's part; of a gradually developing 〃grouch〃 brought on by the
loneliness of his surroundings。  After a night of duty he had
marched into the house; packed his belongings in a battered canvas
extension case; and announced his intention of resigning from the
service。

〃To the everlastin' brimstone with the job!〃 he snarled; addressing
Mr。 Atkins; who; partially dressed; emerged from the bedroom in
bewilderment and sleepy astonishment。  〃To thunder with it; I say!
I've had all the gov'ment jobs I want。  Life…savin' service was bad
enough; trampin' the condemned beach in a howlin' no'theaster; with
the sand cuttin' furrers in your face; and the icicles on your
mustache so heavy you got round…shouldered luggin' 'em。  But when
your tramp was over; you had somebody to talk to。  Here; by
godfreys! there ain't nothin' nor nobody。  I'm goin' fishin' again;
where I can be sociable。〃

〃Humph!〃 commented Seth; 〃you must be lonesome all to once。  Ain't
my company good enough for you?〃

〃Company!  A heap of company you are!  When I'm awake you're alseep
and snorin' and〃

〃I never snored in my life;〃 was the indignant interruption

〃What?  YOU'LL snore when you're dead; and wake up the whole
graveyard。  Lonesome!〃 he continued; without giving his companion a
chance to retort; 〃lonesome ain't no name for this place。  No
company but green flies and them moskeeters; and nothin' to look at
but salt water and sand andanddummed if I can think of anything
else。  Five miles from town and the only house in sight shut tight。
When I come here you told me that bungalow was opened up every year〃

〃So it has been till this season。〃

〃And that picnics come here every once in a while。〃

〃Don't expect picnickers to be such crazy loons as to come here in
winter time; do you?〃

〃I don't know。  If they're fools enough to come here ANY time; I
wouldn't be responsible for 'em。  There a

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