sk.theshining-第18节

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ot。　But　they　were　only　sitting　there。　She　could　barely　see　the　small　silhouette　of　her　son's　head；　turned　attentively　toward　Hallorann's　big　one。　Even　at　this　distance　that　small　head　had　a　set　to　it　that　she　recognized…　it　was　the　way　her　son　looked　when　there　was　something　on　the　TV　that　particularly　fascinated　him；　or　when　he　and　his　father　were　playing　old　maid　or　idiot　cribbage。　Jack；　who　was　still　looking　around　for　Ullman；　hadn't　noticed。
　　Wendy　kept　silent；　watching　Hallorann's　car　nervously；　wondering　what　they　could　possibly　be　talking　about　that　would　make　Danny　cock　…his　head　that　way。
　　In　the　car　Hallorann　was　saying：　〃Get　you　kinda　lonely；　thinkin　you　were　the　only　one？〃　Danny；　who　had　been　frightened　as　well　as　lonely　sometimes；　nodded。　〃Am　I　the　only　one　you　ever　met？〃　he　asked。
　　Hallorann　laughed　and　shook　his　head。　〃No；　child；　no。　But　you　shine　the　hardest。〃
　　〃Are　there　lots；　then？〃
　　〃No；〃　Hallorann　said；　〃but　you　do　run　across　them。　A　lot　of　folks；　they　got　a　little　bit　of　shine　to　them。　They　don't　oven　know　it。　But　they　always　seem　to　show　up　with　flowers　when　their　wives　are　feelin　blue　with　the　monthlies；　they　do　good　on　school　tests　they　don't　even　study　for；　they　got　a　good　idea　how　people　are　feelin　as　soon　as　they　walk　into　a　room。　I　e　across　fifty　or　sixty　like　that。　But　maybe　only　a　dozen；　countin　my　gram；　that　knew　they　was　shinin。〃
　　〃Wow；〃　Danny　said；　and　thought　about　it。　Then：　〃Do　you　know　Mrs。　Brant？〃
　　〃Her？〃　Hallorann　asked　scornfully。　〃She　don't　shine。　Just　sends　her　supper　back　two…three　times　every　night。〃
　　〃I　know　she　doesn't；〃　Danny　said　earnestly。　〃But　do　you　know　the　man　in　the　gray　uniform　that　gets　the　cars？〃
　　〃Mike？　Sure；　I　know　Mike。　What　about　him？〃
　　〃Mr。　Hallorann；　why　would　she　want　his　pants？〃
　　〃What　are　you　talking　about；　boy？〃
　　〃Well；　when　she　was　watching　him；　she　was　thinking　she　would　sure　like　to　get　into　his　pants　and　I　just　wondered　why…〃　But　he　got　no　further。　Hallorann　had　thrown　his　head　back；　and　rich；　dark　laughter　issued　from　his　chest；　rolling　around　in　the　car　like　cannonfire。　The　seat　shook　with　the　force　of　it。　Danny　smiled；　puzzled；　and　at　last　the　storm　subsided　by　fits　and　starts。　Hallorann　produced　a　large　silk　handkerchief　from　his　breast　pocket　like　a　white　flag　of　surrender　and　wiped　his　streaming　eyes。
　　〃Boy；〃　he　said；　still　snorting　a　little；　〃you　are　gonna　know　everything　there　is　to　know　about　the　human　condition　before　you　make　ten。　I　dunno　if　to　envy　you　or　not。〃
　　〃But　Mrs。　Brant…〃
　　〃You　never　mind　her；〃　he　said。　〃And　don't　go　askin　your　mom；　either。　You'd　only　upset　her；　dig　what　I'm　sayin？〃
　　〃Yes；　sir；〃　Danny　said。　He　dug　it　perfectly　well。　He　had　upset　his　mother　that　way　in　the　past。
　　〃That　Mrs。　Brant　is　just　a　dirty　old　woman　with　an　itch；　that's　all　you　have　to　know。〃　He　looked　at　Danny　speculatively。　〃How　hard　can　you　hit；　doc？〃
　　〃Huh？〃
　　〃Give　me　a　blast。　Think　at　me。　I　want　to　know　if　you　got　as　much　as　I　think　you　do。〃
　　〃What　do　you　want　me　to　think？〃
　　〃Anything。　Just　think　it　hard。〃
　　〃Okay；〃　Danny　said。　He　considered　it　for　a　moment；　then　gathered　his　concentration　and　flung　it　out　at　Hallorann。　He　had　never　done　anything　precisely　like　this　before；　and　at　the　last　instant　some　instinctive　part　of　him　rose　up　and　blunted　some　of　the　thought's　raw　force…he　didn't　want　to　hurt　Mr。
　　Hallorann。　Still　the　thought　arrowed　out　of　him　with　a　force　he　never　would　have　believed。　It　went　like　a　Nolan　Ryan　fastball　with　a　little　extra　on　it。
　　（Gee　I　hope　I　don't　hurt　him）　And　the　thought　was：　（！！！　HI；　DICK！！！）　Hallorann　winced　and　jerked　bac　kward　on　the　seat。　His　teeth　came　together　with　a　hard　click；　drawing　blood　from　his　lower　lip　in　a　thin　trickle。　His　hands　flew　up　involuntarily　from　his　lap　to　the　level　of　his　chest　and　then　settled　back　again。　For　a　moment　his　eyelids　fluttered　limply；　with　no　conscious　control；　and　Danny　was　frightened。
　　〃Mr。　Hallorann？　Dick？　Are　you　okay？〃
　　〃I　don't　know；〃　Hallorann　said；　and　laughed　weakly。　〃I　honest　to　God　don't。　My　God；　boy；　you're　a　pistol。〃
　　〃I'm　sorry；〃　Danny　said；　more　alarmed。　〃Should　I　get　my　daddy？　I'll　run　and　get　him。〃
　　〃No；　here　I　e。　I'm　okay；　Danny。　You　just　sit　right　there。　I　feel　a　little　scrambled；　that's　all。〃
　　〃I　didn't　go　as　hard　as　I　could；〃　Danny　confessed。　〃I　was　scared　to；　at　the　last　minute。〃
　　〃Probably　my　good　luck　you　did　。　。　。　my　brains　would　be　leakin　out　my　ears。〃　He　saw　the　alarm　on　Danny's　face　and　smiled。　〃No　harm　done。　What　did　it　feel　like　to　you？〃
　　〃Like　I　was　Nolan　Ryan　throwing　a　fastball；〃　he　replied　promptly。
　　〃You　like　baseball；　do　you？〃　Hallorann　was　rubbing　his　temples　gingerly。
　　〃Daddy　and　me　like　the　Angels；〃　Danny　said。　〃The　Red　Sox　in　the　American　League　East　and　the　Angels　in　the　West。　We　saw　the　Red　Sox　against　Cincinnati　in　the　World　Series。　I　was　a　lot　littler　then。　And　Daddy　was　。　。　。〃　Danny's　face　went　dark　and　troubled。
　　〃Was　what；　Dan？〃
　　〃I　forget；〃　Danny　said。　He　started　to　put　his　thumb　in　his　mouth　to　suck　it；　but　that　was　a　baby　trick。　He　put　his　hand　back　in　his　lap。
　　〃Can　you　tell　what　your　mom　and　dad　are　thinking；　Danny？〃　Hallorann　was　watching　him　closely。
　　〃Most　times；　if　I　want　to。　But　usually　I　don't　try。〃
　　〃Why　not？〃
　　〃Well　。　。　。〃　he　paused　a　moment；　troubled。　〃It　would　be　like　peeking　into　the　bedroom　and　watching　while　they're　doing　the　thing　that　makes　babies。　Do　you　know　that　thing？〃
　　〃I　have　had　acquaintance　with　it；〃　Hallorann　said　gravely。
　　〃They　wouldn't　like　that。　And　they　wouldn't　like　me　peeking　at　their　thinks。
　　It　would　be　dirty。〃
　　〃I　see。〃
　　〃But　I　know　how　they're　feeling；〃　Danny　said。　〃I　can't　help　that。　I　know　how　you're　feeling；　too。　I　hurt　you。　I'm　sorry。〃
　　〃It's　just　a　headache。　I've　had　hangovers　that　were　worse。　Can　you　read　other　people；　Danny？〃
　　〃I　can't　read　yet　at　all；〃　Danny　said；　〃except　a　few　words。　But　Daddy's　going　to　teach　me　this　winter。　My　daddy　used　to　teach　reading　and　writing　in　a　big　school。　Mostly　writing；　but　he　knows　reading；　too。〃
　　〃I　mean；　can　you　tell　what　anybody　is　thinking？〃　Danny　thought　about　it。
　　〃I　can　if　it's　loud；〃　he　said　finally。　〃Like　Mrs。　Brant　and　the　pants。　Or　like　once；　when　me　and　Mommy　were　in　this　big　store　to　get　me　some　shoes；　there　was　this　big　kid　looking　at　radios；　and　he　was　thinking　about　taking　one　without　buying　it。　Then　he'd　think；　what　if　I　get　caught？　Then　he'd　think；　I　really　want　it。　Then　he'd　think　about　getting　caught　again。　He　was　making　himself　sick　about　it；　and　he　was　making　me　sick。　Mommy　was　talking　to　the　man　who　sells　the　shoes　so　I　went　over　and　said；　‘Kid；　don't　take　that　radio。　Go　away。'　And　he　got　really　scared。　He　went　away　fast。〃　Hallorann　was　grinning　broadly。　〃I　bet　he　did。　Can　you　do　anything　else；　Danny？　Is　it　only　thoughts　and　feelings；　or　is　there　more？〃　Cautiously：　〃Is　there　more　for　you？〃
　　〃Sometimes；〃　Hallorann　said。　〃Not　often。　Sometimes　。　。　。　sometimes　there　are　dreams。　Do　you　dream；　Danny？〃
　　〃Sometimes；〃　Danny　said；　〃I　dream　when　I'm　awake。　After　Tony　es。〃　His　thumb　wanted　to　go　into　his　mouth　again。　He　had　never　told　anyone　but　Mommy　and　Daddy　about　Tony。　He　made　his　thumb…sucking　hand　go　back　into　his　lap。
　　〃Who's　Tony？〃　And　suddenly　Danny　had　one　of　those　flashes　of　understanding　that　frightened　him　most　of　all；　it　was　like　a　sudden　glimpse　of　some　inprehensible　machine　that　might　be　safe　or　might　be　deadly　dangerous。　He　was　too　young　to　know　which。
　　He　was　too　young　to　understand。
　　〃What's　wrong？〃　he　cried。　〃You're　asking　me　all　this　because　you're　worried；　aren't　you？　Why　are　you　worried　about　me？　Why　are　you　worried　about　us？〃　Hallorann　put　his　large　dark　hands　on　the　small　boy's　shoulders。　〃Stop；〃　he　said。　It's　probably　nothin。　But　if　it　is　somethin　。　。　。　well；　you've　got　a　large　thing　in　your　head；　Danny。　You'll　have　to　do　a　lot　of　growin　yet　before　you　catch　up　to　it；　I　guess。　You　got　to　be　brave　about　it。〃
　　〃But　I　don't　understand　thingsl〃　Danny　burst　out。　〃I　do　but　I　don't！　People　。
　　。　。　they　feel　things　and　I　feel　them；　but　I　don't　know　what　I'm　feeling！〃　He　looked　down　at　his　lap　wretchedly。　〃I　wish　I　could　read。　Sometimes　Tony　shows　me　signs　and　I　can　hardly　read　any　of　them。〃
　　〃Who's　Tony？〃　Hallorann　asked　again。
　　〃Mommy　and　Daddy　call　him　my　‘invisible　playmate；〃'　Danny　said；　reciting　the　words　carefully。　〃But　he's　really　real。　At　least；　I　think　he　is。　Sometimes；　when　I　try　real　hard　to　understand　things；　he　es。　He　says；　'Danny；　I　want　to　show　you　something。'　And　it's　like　I　pass　out。　Only　。　。　。　there　are　dreams；　like　you　said。〃　He　looked　at　Hallorann　and　swallowed。　〃They　used　to　be　nice。　But　now　。　。
　　。　I　can't　remember　the　word　for　dreams　that　scare　you　and　make　you　cry。〃
　　〃Nightmares？〃　Hallorann　asked。
　　〃Yes。　That's　right。　Nightmares。〃
　　〃About　this　place？　About　the　Overlook？〃　Danny　looked　down　at　his　thumb…sucking　hand　again。　〃Yes；〃　he　whispered。　Then　he　spoke　shrilly；　looking　up　into　Hallorann's　face：　〃But　I　can't　tell　my　daddy；　and　you　can't；　either！　He　has　to　have　this　job　because　it's　the　only　one　Uncle　Al　could　get　for　him　and　he　has　to　finish　his　play　or　he　might　start　doing　the　Bad　Thin