sk.thegunslinger-第6节

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〃Then　why　don't　you　stop？〃
Her　exasperation　startled　her　into　looking　at　him　as　a　man　again；　rather　than　an　infernal　miracle。　What　she　saw　was　a　rather　sad…looking　specimen　only　half…stoned；　looking　hangdog　and　ashamed。　She　could　not　be　frightened　by　him　anymore。
〃I　shake；〃　he　said。　〃And　I　want　it。　I　can't　stop。　Allie；　you　was　always　so　good　to　me　　〃he　began　to　weep。　〃I　can't　even　stop　peeing　myself。〃
She　walked　to　the　table　and　hesitated　there；　uncertain。
〃He　could　have　made　me　not　want　it；〃　he　said　through　the　tears。　〃He　could　have　done　that　if　he　could　have　made　me　be　alive。　I　ain't　plaining　。。。　I　don't　want　to　plain。。。　〃He　stared　around　hauntedly　and　whispered；　〃He　might　strike　me　dead　if　I　did。〃
〃Maybe　it's　a　joke。　He　seemed　to　have　quite　a　sense　of　humor。〃
Nort　took　his　poke　from　where　it　dangled　inside　his　shirt　and　brought　out　a　handful　of　grass。　Unthinkingly　she　knocked　it　away　and　then　drew　her　hand　back；　horrified。
〃I　can't　help　it；　Allie；　I　can't　　〃and　he　made　a　crippled　dive　for　the　poke。　She　could　have　stopped　him；　but　she　made　no　effort。　She　went　back　to　lighting　the　lamps；　tired　although　the　evening　had　barely　begun。　But　nobody　came　in　that　night　except　old　man　Kennerly；　who　had　missed　everything。　He　did　not　seem　particularly　surprised　to　see　Nort。　He　ordered　beer；　asked　where　Sheb　was；　and　pawed　her。　The　next　day　things　were　almost　normal；　although　none　of　the　children　followed　Nort。　The　day　after　that；　the　catcalls　resumed。　Life　had　gotten　back　on　its　own　sweet　keel。　The　uprooted　corn　was　gathered　together　by　the　children；　and　a　week　after　Nort's　resurrection；　they　burned　it　in　the　middle　of　the　street。　The　fire　was　momentarily　bright　and　most　of　the　barflies　stepped　or　staggered　out　to　watch。　They　looked　primitive。　Their　faces　seemed　to　float　between　the　flames　and　the　ice…chip　brilliance　of　the　sky。　Allie　watched　them　and　felt　a　pang　of　fleeting　despair　for　the　sad　times　of　the　world。　Things　had　stretched　apart　There　was　no　glue　at　the　center　of　things　anymore。　She　had　never　seen　the　ocean；　never　would。
〃If　I　had　grits；〃　she　murmured；　〃If　I　had　guts；　guts；　guts。。。〃
Nort　raised　his　head　at　the　sound　of　her　voice　and　smiled　emptily　at　her　from　hell。　She　had　no　guts。　Only　a　bar　and　a　scar。
The　fire　burned　down　rapidly　and　her　customers　came　back　in。　She　began　to　dose　herself　with　the　Star　Whiskey；　and　by　midnight　she　was　blackly　drunk。
　
　
VIII
　
　
She　ceased　her　narrative；　and　when　he　made　no　immediate　ment；　she　thought　at　first　that　the　story　had　put　him　to　sleep。　She　had　begun　to　drowse　herself　when　he　asked：　〃That's　all？〃
〃Yes。　That's　all。　It's　very　late。〃
〃Um。〃　He　was　rolling　another　cigarette。
〃Don't　go　getting　your　tobacco　dandruff　in　my　bed；〃　she　told　him；　more　sharply　than　she　had　intended。
〃No。〃
Silence　again。　The　tip　of　his　cigarette　winked　off　and　on。
〃You'll　be　leaving　in　the　morning；〃　she　said　dully。
〃I　should。　I　think　he's　left　a　trap　for　me　here。〃
〃Don't　go；〃　she　said。
〃We'll　see。〃
He　turned　on　his　side　away　from　her；　but　she　was　forted。　He　would　stay。　She　drowsed。
On　the　edge　of　sleep　she　thought　again　about　the　way　Nort　had　addressed　him；　in　that　strange　talk。　She　had　not　seen　him　express　emotion　before　or　since。　Even　his　lovemaking　had　been　a　silent　thing；　and　only　at　the　last　had　his　breathing　roughened　and　then　stopped　for　a　minute。　He　was　like　something　out　of　a　fairytale　or　a　myth；　the　last　of　his　breed　in　a　world　that　was　writing　the　last　page　of　its　book。　It　didn't　matter。　He　would　stay　for　a　while。　Tomorrow　was　time　enough　to　think；　or　the　day　after　that。　She　slept。
　
　
IX
　
　
In　the　morning　she　cooked　him　grits　which　he　ate　without　ment。　He　shoveled　them　into　his　mouth　without　thinking　about　her；　hardly　seeing　her。　He　knew　he　should　go。　Every　minute　he　sat　here　the　man　in　black　was　further　away　　probably　into　the　desert　by　now。　His　path　had　been　undeviatingly　south。
〃Do　you　have　a　map？〃　he　asked　suddenly；　looking　up。
〃Of　the　town？〃　she　laughed。　〃There　isn't　enough　of　it　to　need　a　map。〃
〃No。　Of　what's　south　of　here。〃
Her　smile　faded。　〃The　desert。　Just　the　desert。　I　thought　you'd　stay　for　a　little。〃
〃What's　south　of　the　desert？〃
〃How　would　T　know？　Nobody　crosses　it。　Nobody's　tried　since　I　was　here。〃　She　wiped　her　hands　on　her　apron；　got　potholders；　and　dumped　the　tub　of　water　she　had　been　heating　into　the　sink；　where　it　splashed　and　steamed。
He　got　up。
〃Where　are　you　going？〃　She　heard　the　shrill　fear　in　her　voice　and　hated　it。
〃To　the　stable。　If　anyone　knows；　the　hostler　will。〃　He　put　his　hands　on　her　shoulders。　The　hands　were　warm。　〃And　to　arrange　for　my　mule。　If　I'm　going　to　be　here；　he　should　be　taken　care　of。　For　when　I　leave。〃
But　not　yet。　She　looked　up　at　him。　〃But　you　watch　that　Kennerly。　If　he　doesn't　know　a　thing；　he'll　make　it　up。〃
When　he　left　she　turned　to　the　sink；　feeling　the　hot；　warm　drift　of　her　grateful　tears。
Kennerly　was　toothless；　unpleasant；　and　plagued　with　daughters。　Two　half…grown　ones　peeked　at　the　gunslinger　from　the　dusty　shadows　of　the　barn。　A　baby　drooled　happily　in　the　dirt。　A　full…grown　one；　blonde；　dirty；　sensual；　watched　with　a　speculative　curiosity　as　she　drew　water　from　the　groaning　pump　beside　the　building。
The　hostler　met　him　halfway　between　the　door　to　his　establishment　and　the　street。　His　manner　vacillated　between　hostility　and　a　craven　sort　of　fawning　　like　a　stud　mongrel　that　has　been　kicked　too　often。
〃It's　bein'　cared　for；〃　he　said；　and　before　the　gunslinger　could　reply；　Kennerly　turned　on　his　daughter：　〃You　get　in；　Soobie！　You　get　right　the　hell　in！〃
Soobie　began　to　drag　her　bucket　sullenly　toward　the　shack　appended　to　the　barn。
〃You　meant　my　mule；〃　the　gunslinger　said。
〃Yes；　sir。　Ain't　seen　a　mule　in　quite　a　time。　Time　was　they　used　to　grow　up　wild　for　want　of　'em；　but　the　world　has　moved　on。　Ain't　seen　nothin'　but　a　few　oxen　and　the　coach　horses　and。　。　。　Soobie；　I'll　whale　you；　'fore　God！〃
〃I　don't　bite；〃　the　gunslinger　said　pleasantly。
Kennerly　cringed　a　little。'　It　ain't　you。　No；　sir；　it　ain't　you。〃　He　grinned　loosely。　〃She's　just　naturally　gawky。
She's　got　a　devil。　She's　wild。〃　His　eyes　darkened。　〃It's　ing　to　Last　Times；　mister。　You　know　how　it　says　in　the　Book。　Children　won't　obey　their　parents；　and　a　plague'll　be　visited　on　the　multitudes。〃
The　gunslinger　nodded；　then　pointed　south。　〃What's　out　there？〃
Kennerly　grinned　again；　showing　gums　and　a　few　sociable　yellow　teeth。　〃Dwellers。　Weed。　Desert。　What　else？〃　He　cackled；　and　his　eyes　measured　the　gunslinger　coldly。
〃How　big　is　the　desert？〃
〃Big。〃　Kennerly　endeavored　to　look　serious。　〃Maybe　three　hundred　miles。　Maybe　a　thousand。　I　can't　tell　you；　mister。　There's　nothing　out　there　but　devil…grass　and　maybe　demons。　That's　the　way　the　other　fella　went　The　one　who　fixed　up　Norty　when　he　was　sick。〃
〃Sick？　I　heard　he　was　dead。〃
Kennerly　kept　grinning。　〃Well；　well。　Maybe。　But　we're　growed…up　men；　ain't　we？〃
〃But　you　believe　in　demons。〃
Kennerly　looked　affronted。　〃That's　a　lot　different。〃
The　gunslinger　took　off　his　hat　and　wiped　his　forehead。　The　sun　was　hot；　beating　steadily。　Kennerly　seemed　not　to　notice。　In　the　thin　shadow　by　the　livery；　the　baby　girl　was　gravely　smearing　dirt　on　her　face。
〃You　don't　know　what's　after　the　desert？〃
Kennerly　shrugged。　〃Some　might。　The　coach　ran　through　part　of　it　fifty　years　ago。　My　pap　said　so。　He　used　to　say　'twas　mountains。　Others　say　an　ocean。。。　a　green　ocean　with　monsters。　And　some　say　that's　where　the　world　ends。　That　there　ain't　nothing　but　lights　that'll　drive　a　man　blind　and　the　face　of　God　with　his　mouth　open　to　eat　them　up。〃
〃Drivel；〃　the　gunslinger　said　shortly。
〃Sure　it　is。〃　Kennerly　cried　happily。　He　cringed　again；　hating；　fearing；　wanting　to　please。
〃You　see　my　mule　is　looked　after。〃　He　flicked　Kennerly　another　coin；　which　Kennerly　caught　on　the　fly。
〃Surely。　You　stayin'　a　little？〃
〃I　guess　I　might。〃
〃That　Allie's　pretty　nice　when　she　wants　to　be；　ain't　she？〃
〃Did　you　say　something？〃　The　gunslinger　asked　remotely。
Sudden　terror　dawned　in　Kennerly's　eyes；　like　twin　moons　ing　over　the　horizon。　〃No；　sir；　not　a　word。　And　I'm　sorry　if　I　did。〃　He　caught　sight　of　Soobie　leaning　out　a　window　and　whirled　on　her。　〃I'll　whale　you　now；　you　little　slut…face！　'Fore　God！　I'll　　〃
The　gunslinger　walked　away；　aware　that　Kennerly　had　turned　to　watch　him；　aware　of　the　fact　that　he　could　whirl　and　catch　the　hostler　with　some　true　and　untinctured　emotion　distilled　on　his　face。　He　let　it　slip。　It　was　hot。　The　only　sure　thing　about　the　desert　was　its　size。　And　it　wasn't　all　played　out　in　this　town。　Not　yet。
　
　
XI
　
　
They　were　in　bed　when　Sheb　kicked　the　door　open　and　came　in　with　the　knife。
It　had　been　four　days；　and　they　had　gone　by　in　a　blinking　haze。　He　ate。　He　slept。　He　made　sex　with　Allie。　He　found　that　she　played　the　fiddle　and　he　made　her　play　it　for　him。　She　sat　by　the　window　in　the　milky　light　of　daybreak；　only　a　profile；　and　played　something　haltingly　that　might　have　been　good　if　she　had　been　trained。　He　felt　a　growing　（but　strangely　absent…minded）　affection　for　her　and　thought　this　might　be　the　trap　the　man　in　black　had　left　behind。　He　read　dry　and　tattered　back　issues　of　magazines　with　faded　pictures。　He　thought　very　little　about　everything。
He　didn't　hear　the　little　piano　player　e　up　…