srdonaldson.theillearthwar-第92节

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　The　otherness　of　her　sight；　the　elsewhere　dimension
　of　its　power；　had　focused；　concentrated　until　it　became　the　crux　of　something　savage　and　illimitable。　A　terrible　might　raved　out　of　her　orbs。　Though　her　gaze　was　not　directed　at　him；　it　bored　through　him　like　an　auger。　When　it　was　gone；　it　left　a　bloody　weal　across　him。
　It　was　a　look　of　apocalypse。
　He　could　not　think　of　any　other　name　for　it　but　hate。
　
　
　TWENTY…THREE：　Knowledge
　
　THE　sight　sent　him　stumbling　up　the　gully　away　from　her。　He　had　trouble　keeping　himself　erect；　he　listed　as　if　a　gale　had　left　him　aground　somewhere。　He　heard　her　low　cry；　〃Beloved！〃　but　he　could　not　turn　back。　The　vision　made　his　heart　smoke　like　dry　ice；　and　he　needed　to　find　a　place　where　he　could　huddle　over　the　pain　and　gasp　alone。
　For　a　time；　smoke　obscured　his　self…awareness。　He　ran　into　Bannor；　and　fell　back　as　if　he　had　smashed　against　a　boulder。　The　impact　surprised　him。　Bannor's　flat　mien　had　the　force　of　a　denunciation。　Instinctively；　he　recoiled。　〃Don't　touch　me！〃　He　lurched　off　in　another　direction；　stumbled　through　the　night　until　he　had　placed　a　steep　hill　between　himself　and　the　Bloodguard。　There　he　sat　down　on　the　grass；　wrapped　his　arms　around　his　chest；　and　made　a　deliberate　effort　to　weep。
　He　could　not　do　it。　His　weakness；　his　perpetual　leprosy；　dammed　that　emotional　channel；　he　had　spent　too　long　unlearning　the　release　of　grief。　And　the　frustration　of　failure　made　him　savage。　He　brimmed　with　old；　unresolved　rage。　Even　in　delusion；　he　could　not　escape　the　trap　of　his　illness。　Leaping　to　his　feet；　he　shook　his　fists　at　the　sky　like　a　reefed　and　lonely　galleon　firing　its
　guns　in　bootless　defiance　of　the　invulnerable　ocean。　Damnation）
　But　then　his　self…consciousness　returned。　His　anger　became　bitterly　cold　as　he　bit　off　his　shout；　clamped　shut　that　outlet　for　his　fury。　He　felt　that　he　was　waking　up　after　a　blind　sleep。　Snarling　extremely　between　his　teeth；　he　stalked　away　toward　the　stream。
　He　did　not　bother　to　take　off　his　clothes。　Fiercely；　he　dropped　flat　on　his　face　in　the　water　as　if　he　were　diving　for　some　kind　of　cauterization　or　release　in　the　glacial　frigidity　of　the　brook。
　He　could　not　endure　the　cold　for　more　than　a　moment；　it　burned　over　all　his　flesh；　seized　his　heart　like　a　convulsion。　Gasping；　he　sprang　up　and　stood　shuddering　on　the　rocky　streambed。　The　water　and　the　breeze　sent　a　ravenous　ache　through　his　bones；　as　if　cold　consumed　their　marrow。　He　left　the　stream。
　The　next　instant；　he　saw　Elena's　gaze　again；　felt　it　sear　his　memory。　He　halted。　A　sudden　idea　threw　back　the　chill。　It　sprang　practically　full…grown　into　view　as　if　it　had　been　maturing　for　days　in　the　darkness　of　his　mind；　waiting　until　he　was　ready。
　He　realized　that　he　had　access　to　a　new　kind　of　bargain…an　arrangement　or　promise　distantly　similar；　but　far　superior；　to　the　one　which　he　had　formed　with　the　Ranyhyn。　They　were　too　limited；　they　could　not　meet　his　terms；　fulfill　the　contract　he　had　made　for　his　survival。　But　the　person　with　whom　he　could　now　bargain　was　almost　ideally　suited　to　help　him。
　It　was　just　possible　that　he　could　buy　his　salvation　from　the　High　Lord。
　He　saw　the　difficulties　at　once。　He　did　not　know　what　the　Seventh　Ward　contained。　He　would　have　to　steer　Elena's　apocalyptic　impulse　through　an　unpredictable　future　toward　an　uncertain　goal。　But　that　impulse　was　something　he　could　use。　It　made　her　personally　powerful…powerful　and　vulnerable；　blinded　by　obsession…and　she　held　the　Staff　of　Law。　He　might　be　able　to　induce　her　to　take　his　place；　assume　his　position　at　the　onus　of　Lord　Foul's　machinations。　He　might　be　able　to　lead　her　extravagant　passion　to　replace　his　white　gold　at　the　crux　of　the　Land's　doom。　If　he　could
　get　her　to　undertake　the　bitter　responsibility　which　had　been　so　ineluctably　aimed　at　him；　he　would　be　free。　That　would　remove　his　head　from　the　chopping　block　of　this　delusion。　And　all　he　had　to　do　in　return　was　to　place　himself　at　Elena's　service　in　any　way　which　would　focus　rather　than　dissipate　her　inner　drives　keep　her　under　control　until　the　proper　moment。
　It　was　a　more　expensive　bargain　than　the　one　he　had　made　with　the　Ranyhyn。　It　did　not　allow　him　to　remain　passive；　it　required　him　to　help　her；　manipulate　her。　But　it　was　justified。　During　the　Quest　for　the　Staff　of　Law；　he　had　been　fighting　merely　to　survive　an　impossibly　pelling　dream。　Now　he　understood　his　true　peril　more　clearly。
　So　much　time　had　passed　since　he　had　thought　freedom　possible　that　his　heart　almost　stopped　at　the　thrill　of　the　conception。　But　after　its　first　excitement；　he　found　that　he　was　shivering　violently。　His　clothes　were　pletely　soaked。
　Aching　with　every　move；　he　started　back　toward　the　gully　and　the　High　Lord。
　He　found　her　sitting　despondent　and　thoughtful　beside　a　bright　campfire。　She　wore　one　blanket　over　her　robe；　the　others　were　spread　out　by　the　blaze　for　warmth。　When　he　entered　the　gully；　she　looked　up　eagerly。　He　could　not　meet　her　eyes。　But　she　did　not　appear　to　notice　the　chagrin　behind　his　blue　lips　and　taut　forehead。　Snatching　up　a　warm　blanket　for　him；　she　drew　him　close　to　the　fire。　Her　few　low　ments　were　full　of　concern；　but　she　asked　him　nothing　until　the　games　had　beaten　back　his　worst　shivers。　Then；　shyly；　as　if　she　were　inquiring　where　she　stood　in　relation　to　him；　she　reached　up　and　kissed　him。
　He　returned　the　caress　of　her　lips；　and　the　movement　seemed　to　carry　him　over　an　inner　hurdle。　He　found　that　he　could　look　at　her　now。　She　smiled　softly；　the　voracious　power　of　her　gaze　was　lost　again　in　its　elsewhere　otherness。　She　appeared　to　accept　his　kiss　at　its　surface　valuation。　She　hugged　him；　then　seated　herself　beside　him。　After　a　moment；　she　asked；　〃Did　it　surprise　you　to　learn　that　I　am　so　vehement？〃
　He　tried　to　excuse　himself。　〃I'm　not　used　to　such　things。　You　didn't　give　me　fair　warning。〃
　〃Pardon　me；　beloved；〃　she　said　contritely。　Then　she　went　on。　〃Were　you　very　dismayed…by　what　you　have　beheld　in　me？〃
　He　thought　for　a　while　before　he　said；　〃I　think　if　you　ever　looked　at　me　that　way　I　would　be　as　good　as　dead。〃
　〃You　are　safe；〃　she　assured　him　warmly。
　〃What　if　you　change　your　mind？〃
　〃Your　doubt　chastises　me。　Beloved；　you　are　part　of　my　life　and　breath。　Do　you　believe　that　I　could　set　you　aside？〃
　〃I　don't　know　what　to　believe。〃　Ids　tone　expressed　vexation；　but　he　hugged　her　again　to　counteract　it。　〃Dreaming　is　like…it's　like　being　a　slave。　Your　dreams　e　out　of　all　the　parts　of　you　that　you　don't　have　any　control　over。　That's　why…that's　why　madness　is　the　only　danger。〃
　He　was　grateful　that　she　did　not　attempt　to　argue　with　him。　When　the　shivering　was　driven　from　his　bones；　he　became　incontestably　drowsy。　As　she　put　him　to　bed；　wrapped　him　snugly　in　his　blankets　by　the　campfire；　the　only　thing　which　kept　him　from　trusting　her　pletely　was　the　conviction　that　his　bargain　contained　something　dishonest。
　For　the　most　part；　he　forgot　that　conviction　during　the　next　three　days。　His　attention　was　clouded　by　a　low　fever　which　he　seemed　to　have　caught　from　his　plunge　in　the　stream。　Febrile　patches　appeared　on　his　obdurately　pale　cheeks；　his　forehead　felt　clammy　with　sweat　and　cold；　and　his　eyes　glittered　as　if　he　were　in　the　grip　of　a　secret　excitement。　From　time　to　time；　he　dozed　on　the　back　of　his　battered　mount；　and　awoke　to　find　himself　babbling　deliriously。　He　could　not　always　remember　what　he　had　said；　but　at　least　once　he　had　insisted　maniacally　that　the　only　way　to　stay　well　was　to　be　perpetually　awake。　No　antiseptic　could　cleanse　the　wounds　inflicted　in　dreams。　The　innocent　did　not　dream。
　When　he　was　not　mumbling　in　half…sleep；　he　was　occupied　with　the　trek　itself。

　The　High　Lord's　party　was　nearing　some　kind　of　destination。
　The　morning　after　the　landslide　had　dawned　into　crisp　sunshine…a　clear　vividness　like　an　atonement　for　the　previous　day's　distress。　When　Amok　had　appeared　to　lead　the　High　Lord　onward；　Elena　had　whistled　as　if　she　were　calling　Myrha；　and　another　Ranyhyn　had　answered　the　summons。　Covenant　had　watched　it　gallop　up　the　valley　with　amazement　in　his　face。　The　fidelity　of　the　Ranyhyn　toward　their　own　choices　went　beyond　all　his　conceptions　of　pride　or　loyalty。　The　sight　had　reminded　him　of　his　previous　bargain…a　bargain　which　both　Elena　and　Rue　had　said　was　still　kept　among　the　great　horses。　But　then　he　had　struggled　up　on　his　mustang；　and　other　matters　had　intruded　on　his　fever　tinged　thoughts。　He　had　retained　barely　enough　awareness　to　place　Elena's　marrowmeld　gift　in　Bannor's　care。
　After　the　riders　had　followed　Amok　out　of　the　valley；　Covenant　caught　his　first　glimpse　of　Melenkurion　Skyweir。　Though　it　was　still　many　leagues　almost　due　southeast　of　him；　the　high　mountain　lifted　its　twin；　icebound　peaks　above　the　range's　rugged　horizon；　and　its　glaciers　gleamed　blue　in　the　sunlight　as　if　the　sky's　azure　feet　were　planted　there。　Elena's　guess　seemed　correct：　Amok's　ragged；　oblique　trail　tended　consistently　toward　the　towering　Skyweir。　It　vanished　almost　immediately　as　Amok　led　the　riders　into　the　lee　of…another　cliff；　but　it　reappeared　with　increasing　frequency　as　the　day　passed。　By　the　following　noon；　it　dominated　the　southeastern　horizon。
　But　at　night