ch.doublewhammy-第67节

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　time　until　Fast　Eddie　Spurling　arrived；　Weeb　ordered　the　director　to　run　some　how…to　fishing　videos　supplied　by　the　big　tackle　panies。
　With　only　ten　minutes　until　deadline；　and　the　winter　sun　nearly　gone；　forty…seven　bass　boats　had　checked　in　at　the　ramp。　The　empty　scoreboard　mocked　Charlie　Weeb。　He　could　no　longer　summon　the　courage　to　look　at　the　Happy　Gland　entourage。
　Where　were　Eddie　Spurling　and　his　ringers？
　Backstage　the　young　hydrologist　approached　Reverend　Weeb　and　said；　〃Bad　news…the　water's　worse　today　than　ever。〃
　〃Get　out　of　my　sight；〃　Weeb　said。　He　didn't　give　a　damn　anymore　about　the　water…Eddie's　fish　would　be　fine；　since　they　were　ing　out　of　the　Everglades。
　With　a　grave　look；　the　hydrologist　said；　〃You're　about　to　have　a　major　problem。〃
　〃And　you're　about　to　get　a　size…ten　Florsheim　up　your　ass；　so　get　lost。〃
　Weeb's　earpiece　crackled　and　the　TV　director　said：　〃How　much　longer？〃
　〃We　got　three　boats　out；〃　the　preacher　said。　〃Sit　tight；　it'll　be　worth　it。〃
　It　was。
　Naturally　Skink　was　first　to　hear　them。　He　hopped　off　Decker's　car　and　ambled　down　to　the　dock。　The　other　onlookers　gave　way；　recognizing　him　instantly　as　the　deranged　Cyclops　whom　Reverend　Weeb　had　tried　to　cure。　Skink　stood　alone　until　Decker　and　Catherine　came　down；　holding　hands。
　〃Listen；〃　Skink　said。
　Decker　heard　the　boat。　Whoever　it　was；　he　was　approaching　very　slowly_a　behavior　virtually　unknown　in　professional　bass…fishing　circles。
　〃Engine　trouble？〃　Decker　said。
　Skink　shook　his　head。　A　mischievous　grin　split　his　face。
　Catherine　said；　〃This　ought　to　be　good。〃
　Suddenly　the　dock　was　washed　in　hot　light　as　the　kliegs　came　on。　An　OCN　cameraman；　a　wiry　young　man　with　curly　red　hair；　hustled　across　the　boat　ramp　with　the　Minicam　balanced　on　one　shoulder。　Without　explanation　he　handed　the　camera　and　battery　pack　to　R。　J。　Decker；　and　bounded　away。
　〃Prior　engagement；〃　Skink　explained。　Catherine　couldn't　be　sure；　but　she　thought　he　winked　his　good　eye　behind　the　sunglasses。
　Decker　got　the　Minicam　focused　while　Catherine　fitted　the　headset　over　his　ears。　In　the　earphone　he　could　hear　the　director　hollering　for　Camera　Two　to　get　steady。
　〃This　is　a　breeze；〃　Decker　said。　A　four…year…old　could　work　the　zoom。
　Skink　rubbed　his　leathery　hands　together。　〃Lights！　Camera！〃
　Decker　aimed　down　the　lake　and　waited。　Before　long　a　bass　boat　chugged　into　view。　It　was　Fast　Eddie　Spurting；　going　slow。　The　reason　was　obvious。
　He　was　towing　two　other　boats。
　〃Is　it　Spurling？〃　the　TV　director　barked　at　Camera　Two。
　〃Yep；〃　Decker　said。
　The　word　was　relayed　to　Reverend　Weeb；　who　got　on　the　PA　system　and　beckoned　all　within　earshot　to　return　at　once　to　the　dock　area。　Even　those　who　had　fled　to　the　buses　emerged　to　see　what　was　going　on。
　〃Go　tight；　Rudy；〃　the　director　instructed　Decker；　and　Decker　obliged；　as　Rudy　would　have。
　As　the　procession　of　boats　tediously　made　its　way　up　Lunker　Lake　Number　One；　a　few　people　in　the　crowd　（specifically；　those　with　binoculars）　began　to　react　alarmingly。　Curious；　Charlie　Weeb　stepped　down　from　the　stage　to　join　his　congregation　at　water's　edge。
　R。　J。　Decker　was　doing　quite　well　with　the　TV　camera。　Through　the　viewfinder　everything　was　in　perfect　focus。
　There　was　Eddie　Spurling　half…turned　in　the　driver's　seat　as　he　checked　the　crippled　boats　on　his　towline。
　The　first　was　the　wooden　skiff…there　were　Jim　Tile　and　Al　Garcia；　sitting　aft　and　stern。　They　toasted　the　TV　lights　with　cans　of　Budweiser。
　Charlie　Weeb　let　out　a　whimper。　〃Mother　of　God；　it's　the　Tile　Brothers。〃　He　had　pletely　forgotten　about　the　spic　and　the　spade。　〃Get　the　camera　offa　them！〃　the　preacher　screamed。
　Slowly　R。　J。　Decker　panned　to　the　second　boat；　and　when　he　did　his　knees　nearly　crimped。
　It　was　the　Starcraft；　and　it　wasn't　the　way　Decker　had　left　it。
　Catherine　said；　〃Oh　no；〃　and　moved　behind　Skink。　She　leaned　her　head　against　his　back；　and　closed　her　eyes。
　The　boat　was　full　of　buzzards。
　There　was　a　ragged　cluster　of　at　least　a　dozen…burly　fearless　birds；　oily　brown；　stoop…shouldered；　with　raw　pink　heads　and　sharp　ruthless　eyes。　They　belched　and　shifted　and　blinked　in　the　bright　light；　but　they　didn't　fly。　They　were　too　full。
　〃Tough　customers；〃　Skink　whispered　to　Decker。
　Numbly　Decker　let　the　TV　camera　peer　into　the　boat。　He　ignored　the　disembodied　voice　shrieking　from　his　earpiece。
　The　buzzards　stood　in　a　litter　of　human　bones。　The　bones　were　clean；　but　occasionally　one　of　the　rancid　birds　would　bend　down　and　pick　savagely；　as　a　possessive　gesture　to　the　others。　The　biggest　buzzard；　a　disheveled　male　with　a　stained　crooked　beak；　palmed　a　bare　yellow　skull　in　its　talons。
　〃Looks　like　a　dog；〃　Skink　said；　puzzled。
　〃It's　Lucas；〃　Catherine　sighed。　〃Rage；　I　want　to　go　home。〃
　As　soon　as　Eddie　Spurling　tied　off　the　boats；　Charlie　Weeb　barged　forward　and　said；　〃Why'd　you　tow　those　fuckers　in？〃
　〃Because　they　ast　me　to。〃
　〃So　where's　the　fish？〃
　〃No　fish；〃　Eddie　Spurling　reported。　〃I　got　skunked。〃
　Weeb　sucked　on　his　upper　lip。　He　had　to　be　careful　what　he　said。　There　was　a　decent…sized　crowd　now；　the　other　contestants　had　hung　around　just　to　see　how　the　famous　TV　fisherman　had　fared。
　〃What　do　you　mean；　no　fish…how　is　that　possible？〃　Weeb　spoke　in　a　low　strained　voice。　He　used　his　eyes　to　grill　Eddie　about　the　ringers…where　the　fuck　were　they！
　〃Damn　rascals　just　weren't　bitin'。〃
　〃You're　in　big　trouble；　Eddie。〃
　〃Naw；　I　don't　think　so。〃
　The　sports　reporter　from　OCN　poked　his　microphone　into　Spurling's　face　and　asked　the　star　of　Fish　Fever　what　had　happened。
　〃Just　one　of　those　days；〃　Fast　Eddie　mused；　〃when　you　feel　like　a　spit…valve　on　the　trombone　of　life。〃
　Al　Garcia　and　Jim　Tile　climbed　out　of　the　skiff　with　the　Igloo　cooler。　Skink　was　waiting　for　them。
　〃We　didn't　get　Queenie；〃　Garcia　said。
　〃I　know。〃
　Garcia　looked　at　Jim　Tile；　then　at　Skink。
　Skink　said；　〃Bet　you　boys　had　some　engine　trouble。〃
　〃I　don't　believe　this；〃　Garcia　said。　He　realized　what　had　happened；　but　he　didn't　know　why。
　〃What's　going　on；　jungle　man？〃
　〃Change　of　plans；〃　Skink　said。　〃Late…breaking　brainstorm。〃
　Jim　Tile　was　thinking　about　it。　〃The　Starcraft　isn't　one　of　the　tournament　boats。〃
　〃No；〃　Skink　said；　〃it's　not。　Ask　Decker　about　that　one。〃
　Garcia　said；　That　means　there's　another　guy　still　out　on　the　water。〃
　〃Right；〃　said　Jim　Tile。　〃Dennis　Gault。〃
　Skink　looked　pleased。　〃You　boys　are　pretty　sharp；　even　for　cops。〃
　Al　Garcia　remembered　what　Skink　had　taught　him　about　the　huge　fish。　〃Just　what　the　hell　have　you　done？〃　he　asked。
　〃It's　not　me；　senor。　I　just　arranged　things。〃　Skink　flipped　open　the　lid　of　the　Igloo　and　saw　Garcia's　little　bass；　darting　in　the　clean　water。　〃I'll　be　damned；　Sergeant；　I'm　proud　of　you。〃
　Jim　Tile　said；　〃Sir；　there's　something　you　ought　to　know。〃
　〃In　a　minute；　Trooper　Jim。　First　let's　get　this　little　scupper　to　the　weigh　station。〃　By　himself　Skink　hoisted　the　heavy　cooler　and　elbowed　his　way　through　the　crowd。　〃You　won't　believe　this；〃　he　was　saying　over　his　shoulder　to　Tile　and　Garcia；　〃but　I　believe　you're　the　only　boat　that　caught　fish。〃
　〃That's　what　we're　trying　to　tell　you；〃　Garcia　said；　huffing　behind。
　Skink　climbed　the　stage　and　carried　the　cooler　to　the　scale。　He　took　out　the　little　bass　and　carefully　set　him　in　the　basket。　Behind　them　onstage　the　digital　scale　lighted　up　with　glowing　six…foot　numerals：　〃14　oz。〃
　〃Ha…ha！〃　Skink　cawed。　He　found　the　stage　mike　and　boomed　into　the　PA　system：　〃Attention；　K…Mart　shoppers！　We've　got　a　winner。〃
　〃Shitfire；〃　Charlie　Weeb　muttered。　The　voice　on　the　PA　sounded　just　like　the　blind　man。　First　a　boatload　of　buzzards；　and　now　what？
　
　As　the　queasy　preacher　followed　the　OCN　camerman　to　the　weigh　station；　it　occurred　to　him　it　wasn't　red…haired　Rudy；　but　someone　else　with　the　Minicam；　someone　Weeb　didn't　recognize。　It　made　little　sense；　but　in　the　unremitting　chaos　of　the　day　it　seemed　a　negligible　mystery。
　The　blind　man　was　not　onstage　when　Charlie　Weeb　got　there；　but　another　nightmare　awaited　him。
　The　Tile　Brothers。
　〃Hola；〃　Jim　Tile　said　to　Charlie　Weeb。　〃muy　grande　fish；　no？〃
　〃Check　it　out；　bro；〃　Al　Garcia　said。
　Charlie　Weeb　got　a　bilious　taste　in　his　throat。　〃It　appears　that　you　are　indeed　the　winner；〃　he　said。　The　Minicam　was　right　in　his　face…all　America　was　watching。　Somehow　Weeb　posed　himself　and　raised　the　puny　bass　for　the　camera。　Two　girls　in　orange　bikinis　rolled　out　the　immense　trophy；　and　two　more　carried　out　a　giant　cardboard　facsimile　of　the　check　for　two　hundred　and　fifty　thousand　dollars。
　〃That's　righteous；〃　Al　Garcia　said；　causing　Jim　Tile　to　wince；　〃but　where　be　the　real　thing？〃
　〃Ah；〃　Weeb　said。　How　could　he　go　on　TV　and　say　that；　after　all　this；　the　check　was　missing？　That　he　and　Deacon　Johnson　were　the　only　two　human　beings　with　the　bination　to　the　safe；　and　now　Deacon　Johnson　was　gone？
　Sensing　trouble；　Jim　Tile　asked；　〃Donde　esta　el　cheque？〃
　〃I'm　sorry；〃　Reverend　Weeb　said；　〃but　I　don't　speak　Cubish。〃
　By　way　of　translation；　Al　Garcia　said：　〃Where's　the　fucking　bread；　por　favor？〃
　Weeb　attempted　several　explanations；　none　persuasive　and　none　contradicting　the　fact　that　he　had　promised　to　present　the　check