srdonaldson.thepowerthatpreserves-第98节
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rest on which his life depended had been broken。 Illness reached down into his soul like tendrils of affectlessness； searching like tree roots in a rock for cracks； flaws； at which the rock could be split asunder。 He was as weak and weary as any nightmare could make him without causing the labor of his heart to stop。
But when he lowered his bloodied hands…when the swift poison of Foul's touch made his lip blacken and swell so acutely that he could no longer bear to touch it…when he looked up again toward the Despiser； he was not abject。 He was unbeaten。
Damn you； he muttered dimly。 Damn you。 It's not that easy。 Deliberately； he closed his fingers of his halfhand around his ring。
The Despiser's eyes raged at him； but Lord Foul controlled himself to say in a sneering； fatherly tone； 〃e； Unbeliever。 Do not prolong this unpleasantness。 You know that you cannot stand against me。 In my own name I am wholly your superior。 And I possess the Illearth Stone。 I can blast the moon in its course； pel the oldest dead from their deep graves； spread ruin at my whim。 Without effort I can tear every fiber of your being from its moor and scatter the wreck of your soul across the heavens。〃
Then do it； Covenant muttered。
〃Yet I choose to forbear。 I do not purpose harm against you。 Only place your ring in my hand； and all your torment will be at an end。 It is a small price to pay； Unbeliever。〃
It's not that easy。
〃And I am not powerless to reward you。 If you wish to share my rule over the Land； I will permit you。 You will find I am not an uncongenial master。 If you wish to preserve the life of your friend Foamfollower； I will not demur…though he has offended me。〃 Foamfollower thrashed in his chains； struggled to protest； but he could not speak。 〃If you wish health； that also I can and will provide。 Behold！〃
He waved one penumbral arm； and a ripple of distortion passed over Covenant's senses。 At once； feeling flooded back into his hands and feet； his nerves returned to life in an instant。 While they flourished； all his distress…all pain and hunger and weakness…sloughed off him。 His body seemed to crow with triumphant life。
He was unmoved。 He found his voice； breathed wearily through his teeth。 〃Health isn't my problem。 You're the one who teaches lepers to hate themselves。〃
〃Groveler！〃 Lord Foul snapped。 Without transition； Covenant became leprous and starved again。 〃You are on your knees to me！ I will make you plead for the veriest fragments of life！ Do lepers hate themselves？ Then they are wise。 I will teach you the true stature of hatred！〃
For a moment； the Despiser's own immitigable hate gouged down at Covenant from his carious eyes； and Covenant braced himself for an onslaught。 But then Lord Foul began to laugh。 His scorn shone from him； shook the air of the thronehall like the sound of great boulders crushing each other； made even the hard stone of the floor seem as insidious as a quagmire。 And when he subsided； he said； 〃You are a dead man before me； groveler…as crippled of life as any corpse。 Yet you refuse me。 You refuse health； mastery； even friendship。 I am interested…I am forbearant。 I will allow you time to think better of your madness。 Tell me why you are so rife with folly。〃
Covenant did not hesitate。 〃Because I loathe you。〃
〃That is no reason。 Many men believe that they loathe me because they are too craven to despise stupidity； foolhardiness； pretension； subservience。 I am not misled。 Tell me why； groveler。〃
〃Because I love the Land。〃
〃Oh； forsooth！〃 Lord Foul jeered。 〃I cannot believe that you are so anile。 The Land is not your world…it has no claim upon your small fidelity。 From the first； it has tormented you with demands you could not meet； honor you could not earn。 You portray yourself as a man who is faithful unto death in the name of a fashion of apparel or an accident of diet…loyal to filthy robes and sand。 No； groveler。 I an unconvinced。 Again； I say； tell me why。〃 He pronounced his why as if with that one syllable he could make Covenant's entire edifice founder。
The Land is beautiful； Covenant breathed to himself。 You're ugly。 For a time； he felt too weary to respond。 But at last he brought out his answer。
〃Because I don't believe。〃
〃No？〃 the Despiser shouted with glee。 〃Still？〃 His laughter expressed perfect contempt。 〃Groveler； you are pathetic beyond price。 Almost I am persuaded to keep you at my side。 You would be a jester to lighten my burdens。〃 Still he catechized Covenant。 〃How is it possible that you can loathe or love where you do not believe？〃
〃Nevertheless。〃
〃How is it possible to disbelieve where you loathe or love？〃
〃Still。〃
Lord Foul laughed again。 〃Do my ears betray me？ Do you…after my Enemy has done all within his power to sway you…do you yet believe that this is a dream？〃
〃It isn't real。 But that doesn't matter。 That's not important。〃
〃Then what is； groveler？〃
〃The Land。 You。〃
Once more； the Despiser laughed。 But his mirth was short and vicious now； he sounded disturbed； as if there were something in Covenant which he could not understand。 〃The Land and Unbelief；〃 he jeered。 〃You poor； deranged soul！ You cannot have both。 They preclude each other。〃
But Covenant knew better； after all that he had been through； he knew better。 Only by affirming them both； accepting both poles of the contradiction； keeping them both whole； balanced； only by steering himself not between them but with them； could he preserve them both； preserve both the Land and himself； find the place where the parallel lines of his impossible dilemma met。 The eye of the paradox。 In that place lay the reason why the Land had happened to him。 So he said nothing as he stared up at the blank shadow and the emerald aura and the incalculable might of the Despiser。 But in himself； he gritted； No they don't； Foul。 You're wrong。 It's not that easy。 If it were easy； I would have found it long ago。
〃But I grow weary of your stupid assertions；〃 Lord Foul went on after a moment。 〃My patience is not infinite。 And there are other questions I wish to ask。 I will set aside the matter of your entry into my demesne。 It is a small matter； easily explained。 In some manner unknown to me； you suborned a number of my chattel； so that twice I received false reports of your death。 But set it aside。 I will flay the very souls from their bones； and learn the truth。 Answer this question； groveler。〃 He moved closer to Covenant； and the intensity of his voice told Covenant that the Despiser had reached the heart of his probing。 〃This wild magic is not a part of your world。 It violates your Unbelief。 How can you use this power in which you do not believe？〃
There Covenant found the explanation of Lord Foul's forbearance。 The Despiser had spent his time interrogating Covenant rather than simply ripping the fingers off his hand to take the ring because he； Lord Foul； feared that Covenant had secretly mastered the wild magic…that he had concealed his power； risked death in the Spoiled Plains and Hotash Slay and Kurash Qwellinir； permitted himself to be taken captive； so that he could surprise the Despiser； catch Lord Foul from a weak or blind side。
Foul had reason for this fear。 The Staff of Law had been destroyed。
For an instant； Covenant thought he might use this apprehension to help himself in some way。 But then he saw that he could not。 For his own sake； so that his defense would not be flawed by his old duplicity； he told the truth。
〃I don't know how to use it。〃 His voice stumbled thickly past his swollen lip。 〃I don't know how to call it up。 But I know it is real in the Land。 I know how to trigger it。 I know how to bring this bloody icebox down around your ears。〃
The Despiser did not hesitate； doubt。 He seemed to expand in Covenant's sight as he roared savagely； 〃You will trigger nothing！ I have endured enough of your insolence。 Do you say that you are a leper？ I will show you leprosy！〃
Power swarmed around Covenant like a thousand thousand mad wasps。 Before him； the Despiser's blank shadow grew horribly； swept upward larger and larger until it dwarfed Covenant； dwarfed Foamfollower； dwarfed the thronehall itself； it filled the air； the hall； the entire Creche。 He felt himself plunging into the abyss of it。 He cried out for help； but no help came。 Like a stricken bird； he plummeted downward。 The speed of his fall roared in his ears as if it were trying to suck him out of himself。 He could sense the rock on which he would be shattered； unutterably far below him。
In the void； an attar…laden voice breathed； 〃Worship me and I will save you。〃
Giddy terror…lust rushed up in him。 A black whirlwind hurled him at the rock as if all the puissance of the heavens had e to smash him against the unbreakable granite of his fate。 Despite screamed in his mind； demanding admittance； demanding like the suicidal paradox of vertigo to overwhelm him。 But he clung to himself； refused。 He was a leper； the Land was not real； this was not the way he was going to die。
He clenched his fist on the ring with all the frail strength of his arm。
At the crash of impact； pain detonated in his s
