hh.thessrat.sings.the.blues-第5节

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　〃Now　you　are　talking　my　language！　For　the　first　time　I　have　some　interest　in　this　poisonous　project。　Bring　on　the　records…and　some　food…and　I　will　see　what　I　can　do。〃
　Not　very　much　I　thought　to　myself　after　hours　of　reading　and　rereading　the　thin　file；　while　eating　a　number　of　stale　and　tasteless　sandwiches。　The　Admiral　was　slumped　asleep　in　the　armchair　and　snoring　like　a　rocket　exhaust。　There　were　no　answers　here；　so　some　questions　were　very　much　in　order。　Which　gave　me　the　sweet　pleasure　of　waking　him　up。　A　few　good　shakes　did　it　and　those　nasty　little　red　eyes　glared　into　mine。
　〃You　better　have　a　good　reason　for　that。〃
　〃I　do。　How　much　do　you　personally　know　about　Liokukae？〃
　〃Everything；　you　dimwit。　That　is　why　I　am　here。〃
　〃It　seems　to　be　pretty　tightly　sealed　up。〃
　〃Pretty　tightly　is　not　the　way　I　would　describe　it。　Hermetically　sealed；　guarded；　patrolled；　watched；　locked　tight；　quarantined　…　take　your　pick。　Food　and　medicines　are　shipped　in。　Nothing　es　out。〃
　〃Do　they　have　their　own　doctors？〃
　〃No。　Medical　teams　are　stationed　there　in　the　hospital　inside　the　landing　station…which　is　built　like　a　fortress。　And　before　you　even　ask…the　answer　is　no。　What　little　trust　there　is　between　the　Navy　and　the　Liokukaers　involves　the　medical　services。　They　e　to　us　and　we　treat　them。　Let　them　suspect　for　an　instant　that　the　medicos　are　involved　in　hanky…panky　and　the　trust　is　gone。　Disease　and　death　would　be　certain。　We're　not　taking　a　chance　on　that。〃
　〃If　the　rest　of　the　civilized　galaxy　doesn't　know　about　them　…　what　do　they　know　about　us？〃
　〃Everything　I　suppose。　We　do　not　practice　censorship。　We　transmit　all　the　usual　TV　entertainment　channels　as　well　as　educational　and　news　services。　They　are　well　supplied　with　television　receivers　and　can　watch　reruns　of　all　the　most　loathsome　programs　and　series。　The　theory　being　if　we　can　stun　their　minds　with　televised　crap　they　won't　get　up　to　more　trouble。〃
　〃Does　it　work？〃
　〃Possibly。　But　we　do　know　that　they　are　rated　on　top　of　the　galactic　viewing　scale　for　uninterrupted　hours　in　front　of　the　gogglebox。〃
　〃You　go　there　and　take　surveys？〃
　〃Don't　be　stupid。　Recorders　are　sealed　into　the　chassis　of　each　set。　These　can　be　tapped　by　satellite。〃
　〃So　what　we　have　here　is　a　planet　of　murderous；　belligerent；　nutsy　TV　fans？〃
　〃That's　about　the　size　of　it。〃
　I　jumped　to　my　feet；　spilling　dry　crumbs　of　dead　sandwiches　onto　the　carpet。　Raised　my　fists；　and　my　voice；　on　high。
　〃That's　it！〃
　Benbow　blinked　at　me　rapidly　and　scowled。
　〃What's　it？〃
　〃The　answer。　It　is　just　the　glimmering　of　an　idea　now…but　I　know　that　it　will　grow　and　expand　into　something　incredible。　I'm　going　to　sleep　on　it　and　when　I　awake　I　will　polish　it　and　perfect　it　and　describe　it　to　you　in　detail。〃
　〃What　is　it？〃
　〃Don't　be　greedy。　All　in　good　time。〃
　
　CHAPTER　4
　The　automated　kitchen　produced　another　stale　sandwich；　the　machine　was　half…knackered　and　out　of　adjustment；　along　with　a　lukewarm　cup　of　watery　cocoa。　I　crunched　and　sipped　gloomily；　then　found　the　bedroom　down　the　hall。　Air…conditioned　of　course…but　the　window　wasn't　sealed。　I　opened　it　and　sniffed　the　cool　night　air。　The　moon　was　rising；　to　join　the　other　three　already　up。　Made　for　some　interesting　shadows。　A　leg　over　the　windowsill；　a　drop　into　the　garden…and　I　would　be　long　gone　before　any　alarm　might　go　off。
　And　I　would　be　dead　in　twenty…nine　days。　That　little　drink　I　had　drunk　in　prison　really　concentrated　my　attention　and　guaranteed　my　loyalty。　But　could　I　pull　this　plicated　operation　off　in　that　space　of　time？
　Considering　the　consequences　I　had　no　choice。　I　sighed　tremulously；　closed　the　window　and　went　to　bed。　It　had　been　a　very；　very　long　day。
　In　the　morning　I　had　picked　the　lock　on　the　control　panel　in　the　kitchen　and　was　busy　rewiring　it　when　Admiral　Benbow　came　in。
　〃May　I　inquire　politely　just　what　the　hell　you　are　doing？〃
　〃Obviously　trying　to　get　this　crook　device　to　produce　something　other　than　stale　cheese　sandwiches。　There！〃
　I　slammed　the　panel　shut　and　punched　in　a　mand。　A　cup　of　steaming　coffee　instantly　appeared。　Followed　by　a　porcuswinewich；　steaming　and　juicy。　The　Admiral　nodded。
　〃I'll　take　this　one…get　another　for　yourself。　Now　tell　me　your　plan。〃
　I　did。　Mumbling　through　mouthfuls　of　breakfast。
　〃We　are　going　to　spend　some　credits　out　of　the　mountains　of　money　that　we　have　access　to。　First　we　plant　some　news　items。　I　want　interviews；　reviews；　gossip　and　more…all　about　the　new　pop　group　that　is　the　hit　of　the　galaxy。〃
　He　scowled　and　growled。　〃What　pop　group？　What　in　hades　are　you　talking　about？〃
　〃The　planet…busting　hit　group　called　。　。　。〃
　〃Called　what？〃
　〃I　don't　know。　I　haven't　thought　about　it　yet。　Something　way　out　and　memorable。　Or　kinky。〃　I　smiled　and　raised　an　inspired　finger。　〃I　have　it！　Ready？　The　group　is　called　。　。　。　The　Stainless　Steel　Rats！〃
　〃Why？〃
　〃Why　not？〃
　The　Admiral　was　not　happy。　His　scowl　turned　to　a　snarl　and　he　jabbed　a　judgmental　finger　at　me。　〃More　coffee。　Then　tell　me　what　you　are。　talking　about　or　I　will　kill　you。〃
　〃Temper；　temper；　Admiral。　Remember　the　old　blood　pressure。　What　I　am　talking　about　is　getting　to　Liokukae　with　all　the　equipment　I　need；　along　with　some　strong…armed　help。　We　are　going　to　form　a　group　of　musicians　called　The　Stainless　Steel　Rats…〃
　〃What　musicians？〃
　〃Me　for　one…and　you　are　going　to　supply　me　with　the　rest。　You　did　tell　me　that　you　were　head　of　League　Navy　Security？〃
　〃I　did。　I　am。〃
　〃Then　summon　your　troops。　Get　one　of　your　techs　to　research　all　your　field　operators；　all　your　rankings　who　have　ever　served　in　what　passes　for　action　in　this　civilized　universe。　The　search　will　be　a　simple　one　because　we　want　to　know　just　one　single　fact　about　all　of　them。　Are　they　musically　inclined？　Can　they　play　a　musical　instrument；　sing；　dance；　whistle　or　even　hum　in　tune？　Get　the　list　and　we　will　have　our　band。〃
　He　nodded　over　his　coffee。　〃You're　beginning　to　make　sense。　A　pop　group　posed　only　of　security　agents。　But　it　will　take　time　to　put　together；　to　organize；　to　rehearse。〃
　〃Why？〃
　〃So　it　will　sound　good；　you　moron。〃
　〃Who　could　tell　the　difference？　Have　you　ever　listened　to　country…and…coal…mining　music？　Or　Aqua　Regia　and　her　Plutonium　Pals？〃
　〃Point　taken。　So　we　get　this　group　together　and　publicize　them　well　so　all　Liokukae　knows　about　them…〃
　〃And　has　heard　their　music…〃
　〃And　wants　to　hear　more。　On　tour。　Which　is　impossible。　The　planet　is　quarantined。〃
　〃That　is　the　beauty　of　my　plan；　Admiral。　When　the　publicity　peaks；　and　the　fame　of　the　group　is　galaxy…wide；　that　is　when　the　Rats　will　mit　some　crime　so　awful　that　they　will　instantly　be　shipped　off　to　this　prison　planet。　Where　they　will　be　received　with　great　enthusiasm。　And　no　suspicion。　Where　they　will　investigate　and　find　the　alien　artifact　and　get　it　back　so　I　can　have　the　antidote。　One　other　thing。　Before　we　start　operations　I　will　need　three　million　Interstellar　Credits。　In　coins　that　have　been　newly　minted　here。〃
　〃No　way；〃　he　snarled。　〃Funds　will　be　supplied　as　needed。〃
　〃You　missed　the　point。　That　is　my　fee　for　conducting　this　operation。　All　operating　expenses　are　on　top　of　that。　Pay　up　or　else。〃
　〃Or　else　what？〃
　〃Or　else　I　die　in　twenty…nine　days　and　the　operation　dies　and　you　get　a　black　mark　on　your　service　record。〃
　Self…interest　prodded　him　into　an　instant　decision。　〃Why　not。　Those　financially　overburdened　academics　can　afford　it　and　not　even　notice　it。　I'll　get　that　list　for　you。〃
　He　unclipped　his　phone　from　his　belt；　shouted　a　multi…digit　number　into　it；　then　barked　some　brief　mands。　Before　I　had　finished　my　coffee　the　printer　hummed　to　life　in　the　office；　sheets　of　paper　began　to　pile　up　in　the　bin。　We　went　through　them　and　ticked　off　a　number　of　possibilities。　There　were　no　names；　just　code　numbers。　When　this　was　done　I　passed　the　list　back　to　the　Admiral。
　〃We'll　need　plete　files　on　all　the　marked　ones。〃
　〃That　is　classified　and　secret　information。〃
　〃And　you　are　the　Admiral　and　you　can　get　it。〃
　〃I'll　get　it…and　censor　it。　There　is　no　way　I　am　going　to　let　you　know　any　details　of　my　Security　Department。〃
　〃Keep　your　secrets…I　couldn't　care　less。〃　Which　was　of　course　an　outright　lie。　〃Give　them　code　names　as　well　as　numbers；　conceal　their　identities。　All　I　want　to　know　is　their　musical　abilities；　and　will　they　be　any　good　in　the　field　when　the　going　gets　rough。〃
　This　took　a　bit　of　time。　I　went　for　a　long　jog　to　loosen　the　muscles。　Then；　while　my　clothes　were　being　zapped　clean　in　the　vacuum　washer；　I　took　a　hot　shower　followed　by　a　cold　one。　I　made　a　mental　note　to　get　some　more　clothes　soon…but　not　until　this　operation　was　up　and　running。　There　was　no　escaping　that　deadly　clock　that　was　ticking　off　the　seconds　to　doomsday。
　〃Here　is　the　list；〃　the　Admiral　said　when　I　entered　the　office。　〃No　names；　just　numbers。　Male　agents　are　identified　by　the　letter　A　and　。　。　。〃
　〃Let　me　guess…the　females　are　B？〃
　A　growl　was　his　only　response；　he　pletely　lacked　any　sense　of　humor。　I　flipped　through　the　list。　Slim　pickings　among　the　ladies　who　ran　the　gamut　from　B1　to　B4。　Pipe…organ　player；　not　very　likely；　harmonica；　tuba…and　a　singer。
　〃I'll　need　a　photograph　of　B3。　And　what　do　these