cb.imajica1-第44节

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　picked　up　speed。
　〃So　much　for　Patashoqua；〃　Gentle　said　as　the　walls　became　a　mirage。
　〃No　great　loss；〃　Pie　remarked。
　〃But　I　wanted　to　see　the　Merrow　Ti'　TV；〃　Gentle　said。
　〃No　chance；〃　Pie　returned。
　〃Why？〃
　〃It　was　pure　invention；〃　Pie　said。　〃Like　all　my　favorite　things；　including　myself。　Pure　invention！〃
　
　
　19
　
　Though　Jude　had　made　an　oath；　in　all　sobriety；　to　follow　Gentle　wherever　she'd　seen　him　go；　her　plans　for　pursuit　were　stymied　by　a　number　of　claims　upon　her　energies；　the　most　pressing　of　which　was　Clem's。　He　needed　her　advice；　fort；　and　organizational　skills　in　the　dreary；　rainy　days　that　followed　New　Year；　and　despite　the　urgency　of　her　agenda　she　could　scarcely　turn　her　back　on　him。　Taylor's　funeral　took　place　on　January　ninth；　with　a　memorial　service　which　Clem　took　great　pains　to　perfect。　It　was　a　melancholy　triumph：　a　time　for　Taylor's　friends　and　relations　to　mingle　and　express　their　affections　for　the　departed　man。　Jude　met　people　she'd　not　seen　in　many　years；　and　few；　if　any；　failed　to　ment　on　the　one　conspicuous　absentee：　Gentle。　She　told　everybody　what　she'd　told　Clem。　That　Gentle　had　been　going　through　a　bad　time；　and　the　last　she'd　heard　he　was　planning　to　leave　on　holiday。　Clem；　of　course；　would　not　be　fobbed　off　with　such　vague　excuses。　Gentle　had　left　knowing　that　Taylor　was　dead；　and　Clem　viewed　his　departure　as　a　kind　of　cowardice。　Jude　didn't　attempt　to　defend　the　wanderer。　She　simply　tried　to　make　as　little　mention　of　Gentle　in　Clem's　presence　as　she　could。
　But　the　subject　would　keep　ing　up；　one　way　or　another。　Sorting　through　Taylor's　belongings　after　the　funeral；　Clem　came　upon　three　watercolors；　painted　by　Gentle　in　the　style　of　Samuel　Palmer；　but　signed　with　his　own　name　and　dedicated　to　Taylor。　Pictures　of　idealized　landscapes；　they　couldn't　help　but　turn　Clem's　thoughts　back　to　Taylor's　unrequited　love　for　the　vanished　man；　and　Jude's　to　the　place　he　had　vanished　for。　They　were　among　the　few　items　that　Clem；　perhaps　vengefully；　wanted　to　destroy；　but　Jude　persuaded　him　otherwise。　He　kept　one　in　memory　of　Taylor；　gave　one　to　Klein；　and　gave　the　third　to　Jude。
　Her　duty　to　Clem　not　only　took　its　toll　upon　her　time　but　upon　her　focus。　When；　in　the　middle　of　the　month；　he　suddenly　announced　that　he　was　going　to　leave　the　next　day　for　Tenerife；　there　to　tan　his　troubles　away　for　a　fortnight；　she　was　glad　to　be　released　from　the　daily　duties　of　friend　and　forter　but　found　herself　unable　to　rekindle　the　heat　of　ambition　that　had　flared　in　her　at　the　month's　first　hour。　She　had　one　unlikely　touchstone；　however：　the　dog。　She　only　had　to　look　at　the　mutt　and　she　remembered…as　though　it　were　an　hour　ago…standing　at　the　door　of　Gentle's　flat　and　seeing　the　pair　dissolving　in　front　of　her　astonished　eyes。　And　on　the　heels　of　that　memory　came　thoughts　of　the　news　she　had　been　carrying　to　Gentle　that　night：　the　dream　journey　induced　by　the　stone　that　was　now　wrapped　up　and　hidden　from　sight　and　seeing　in　her　wardrobe。　She　was　not　a　great　lover　of　dogs；　but　she'd　taken　the　mongrel　home　that　night；　knowing　it　would　perish　if　she　didn't。　It　quickly　ingratiated　itself；　wagging　a　furious　wele　when　she　returned　home　each　night　after　being　with　Clem；　sneaking　into　her　bedroom　in　the　early　hours　and　making　a　nest　for　itself　in　her　soiled　clothes。　She　called　it　Skin；　because　it　had　so　little　fur；　and　while　she　didn't　dote　on　it　the　way　it　doted　on　her；　she　was　still　glad　of　its　pany。　More　than　once　she　found　herself　talking　to　it　at　great　length；　while　it　licked　its　paws　or　its　balls；　these　monologues　a　means　to　refocus　her　thoughts　without　worrying　that　she　was　losing　her　mind。　Three　days　after　Clem's　departure　for　sunnier　climes；　discussing　with　Skin　how　she　should　best　proceed；　Estabrook's　name　came　up。
　〃You　haven't　met　Estabrook；〃　she　told　Skin。　〃But　I'll　guarantee　you　won't　like　him。　He　tried　to　have　me　killed；　you　know？〃
　The　dog　looked　up　from　its　toilet。
　〃Yes；　I　was　amazed　too；〃　she　said；　〃I　mean；　that's　worse　than　an　animal；　right？　No　disrespect；　but　it　is。　I　was　his　wife。　I　am　his　wife。　And　he　tried　to　have　me　killed。　What　would　you　do；　if　you　were　me？　Yes；　I　know；　I　should　see　him。　He　had　the　blue　eye　in　his　safe。　And　that　book！　Remind　me　to　tell　you　about　the　book　sometime。　No；　maybe　I　shouldn't。　It'll　give　you　ideas。〃
　Skin　settled　his　head　on　his　crossed　paws；　gave　a　small　sigh　of　contentment；　and　started　to　doze。
　〃You're　a　big　help；〃　she　said。　〃I　need　some　advice　here。　What　do　you　say　to　a　man　who　tried　to　have　you　murdered？〃
　Skin's　eyes　were　closed；　so　she　was　obliged　to　furnish　her　own　reply。
　〃I　say：　Hello；　Charlie；　why　don't　you　tell　me　the　story　of　your　life？〃
　She　called　Lewis　Leader　the　next　day　to　find　out　whether　Estabrook　was　still　hospitalized。　She　was　told　he　was；　but　that　he'd　been　moved　to　a　private　clinic　in　Hampstead。　Leader　supplied　details　of　his　whereabouts；　and　Jude　called　to　inquire　both　about　Estabrook's　condition　and　visiting　hours。　She　was　told　he　was　still　under　close　scrutiny　but　seemed　to　be　in　better　spirits　than　he'd　been；　and　she　was　wele　to　e　and　see　him　at　any　time。　There　seemed　little　purpose　in　delaying　the　meeting。　She　drove　up　to　Hampstead　that　very　evening；　through　another　tumultuous　rainstorm；　arriving　to　a　wele　from　the　psychiatric　nurse　in　charge　of　Estabrook's　case；　a　chatty　young　man　called　Maurice　who　lost　his　top　lip　when　he　smiled；　which　was　often；　and　talked　with　an　almost　indiscreet　enthusiasm　about　the　state　of　his　patient's　mind。
　〃He　has　good　days；〃　Maurice　said　brightly。　Then；　just　as　brightly：　〃But　not　many。　He's　severely　depressed。　He　made　one　attempt　to　kill　himself　before　he　came　to　us；　but　he's　settled　down　a　lot。〃
　〃Is　he　sedated？〃
　〃We　help　keep　the　anxiety　controllable；　but　he's　not　drugged　senseless。　We　can't　help　him　get　to　the　root　of　the　problem　if　he　is。〃
　〃Has　he　told　you　what　that　is？〃　she　said；　expecting　accusations　to　be　tossed　in　her　direction。
　〃It's　pretty　obscure；〃　Maurice　said。　〃He　talks　about　you　very　fondly；　and　I'm　sure　your　ing　will　do　him　a　great　deal　of　good。　But　the　problem's　obviously　with　his　blood　relatives。　I've　got　him　to　talk　a　little　about　his　father　and　his　brother；　but　he's　very　cagey。　The　father's　dead；　of　course；　but　maybe　you　can　shed　some　light　on　the　brother。〃…〃I　never　met　him。〃
　〃That's　a　pity。　Charles　clearly　feels　a　great　deal　of　anger　towards　his　brother；　but　I　haven't　got　to　the　root　of　why。　I　will。　It'll　just　take　time。　He's　very　good　at　keeping　his　secrets　to　himself；　isn't　he？　But　then　you　probably　know　that。　Shall　I　take　you　along　to　see　him？　I　did　tell　him　you'd　telephoned；　so　I　think　he's　expecting　you。〃
Jude　was　irritated　that　the　element　of　surprise　had　been　removed；　that　Estabrook　would　have　had　time　to　prepare　his　feints　and　fabrications。　But　what　was　done　was　done；　and　rather　than　snap　at　the　gleeful　Maurice　for　his　indiscretion　she　kept　her　displeasure　to　herself。　She　might　need　the　man's　smiling　assistance　in　the　fullness　of　time。
　Estabrook's　room　was　pleasant　enough。　Spacious　and　fortable；　its　walls　adorned　with　reproductions　of　Monet　and　Renoir；　it　was　a　soothing　space。　Even　the　piano　concerto　that　played　softly　in　the　background　seemed　posed　to　placate　a　troubled　mind。　Estabrook　was　not　in　bed　but　sitting　by　the　window；　one　of　the　curtains　drawn　aside　so　he　could　watch　the　rain。　He　was　dressed　in　pajamas　and　his　best　dressing　gown；　smoking。　As　Maurice　had　said；　he　was　clearly　awaiting　his　visitor。　There　was　no　flicker　of　surprise　when　she　appeared　at　the　door。　And；　as　she'd　anticipated；　he　had　his　wele　ready。
　〃At　last；　a　familiar　face。〃
　He　didn't　open　his　arms　to　embrace　her；　but　she　went　to　him　and　kissed　him　lightly　on　both　cheeks。
　〃One　of　the　nurses　will　get　you　something　to　drink；　if　you'd　like；〃　he　said。
　〃Yes；　I'd　like　some　coffee。　It's　bitter　out　there。〃
　〃Maybe　Maurice'11　get　it；　if　I　promise　to　unburden　my　soul。〃
　〃Do　you？〃　said　Maurice。
　〃I　do。　I　promise。　You'll　know　the　secrets　of　my　potty　training　by　this　time　tomorrow。〃
　〃Milk　and　sugar？〃　Maurice　asked。
　〃Just　milk；〃　Charlie　said。　〃Unless　her　tastes　have　changed。〃
　〃No；〃　she　told　him。
〃Of　course　not。　Judith　doesn't　change。　Judith's　eternal。〃
　Maurice　withdrew；　leaving　them　to　talk。　There　was　no　embarrassed　silence。　He　had　his　spiel　ready；　and　while　he　delivered　it…a　speech　about　how　glad　he　was　that　she'd　e；　and　how　much　he　hoped　it　meant　she　would　begin　to　forgive　him…she　studied　his　changed　face。　He'd　lost　weight　and　was　without　his　toupe'e；　which　revealed　in　his　physiognomy　qualities　she'd　never　seen　before。　His　large　nose　and　tugged…down　mouth；　with　jutting　over…large　lower　lip；　lent　him　the　look　of　an　aristocrat　fallen　on　hard　times。　She　doubted　that　she'd　ever　find　it　in　her　heart　to　love　him　again；　but　she　could　certainly　manage　a　twinge　of　pity；　seeing　him　so　reduced。
　〃I　suppose　you　want　a　divorce；〃　he　said。
　〃We　can　talk　about　that　another　time。〃
　〃Do　you　need　money？〃
　〃Not　at　the　moment。〃
　〃If　you　do…〃
　〃I'll　ask。〃
　A　male　nurse　appeared　with　coffee　for1　Jude；　hot　chocolate　for　Estabrook；　and　biscuits。　When　he'd　gone；　she　plunged　into　a　confession。　One　from　her；　she　reasoned；　might　elicit　one　from　him。
　〃I　went　to　t