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小说: bill_the_galactic_hero_v1.1 字数: 每页4000字

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   〃All of that is correct; Captain; except for the fact that the accused here did absent himself from his assigned station; the Transit Rankers' Center; and was at large upon the planet Helior。〃
  〃All of which is correct; sir;〃 O'Brien said; whipping out yet another volume and waving it over his head。 ‘But in Dragsted versus the Imperial Navy Billeting Corps; Helior; 8832; it was agreed that for purposes of legal definition the
planet Helior was to be defined as the City of Helior; and the City of Helior was to be defined as the planet Helior。〃
  〃All of which is undoubtedly true;〃 the president interrupted; 〃but totally beside the point。 They have no bearing upon the present case and I'll ask you to snap it up; Captain; because I have a golf appointment。〃
  〃You can tee off in ten minutes; sir; if you allow both those precedents to stand。 I then introduce one last item; a document drawn up by Fleet Admiral Marmoset…〃
  〃Why; that's me!〃 the president gasped。   〃…at the onset of hostilities with the Chingers when the City of Helior was
declared under martial law and considered to be a single military establishment。 I therefore submit that the accused is innocent of the charge of desertion since he never left this planet; therefore he never left this city; therefore he never
left his post of duty。〃
   A heavy silence fell and was finally broken by the president's worried voice as he turned to the law officer。 〃Is what this bowb says true; Pablo? Can't we shoot the guy?〃
  The law officer was sweating as he searched feverishly through his law books; then finally pushed them from him and answered in a bitter voice。 〃True enough and no way out of it。 This Arabic…Jewish…Irish con man has got us by the short
hair。 The accused is innocent of the charges。〃
   〃No execution 。 。 。 ?〃 one of the court officers asked in a high; querulous voice; and another; older one dropped his head onto his arms and began to sob。
  〃Well he's not getting off that easily;〃 the president said; scowling at Bill。 〃If the accused was on this post for the last year then he should have been on duty。 And during that year he must have slept。 Which means he slept on duty。 Therefore I sentence him to hard labor in military prison for one year and one day and order that he be reduced in rank to Fuse Tender Seventh Class。 Tear off his stripes and take him away; I have to get to the golf course。 

II

  The transit stockade was a makeshift budding of plastic sheets bolted to bent aluminum frames and was in the center of a large quadrangle。 MPs with bayoneted atomrifles marched around the perimeter of the six electrified barbed…wire
fences。 The multiple gates were opened by remote control; and Bill was dragged through them by the handcuff robot that had brought him here。 This debased machine was a squat and heavy cube as high as his knee that ran on clanking
treads and from the top of which projected a steel bar with heavy handcuffs fastened to the end。 Bill was on the end of the handcuffs。 Escape was impossible; because if any attempt was made to force the cuffs the robot sadistically exploded a peewee atom bomb it had in its guts and blew up itself and the escaping prisoner; as well as anyone else in the vicinity。 Once inside the pound the robot stopped and did not protest when the guard sergeant unlocked the cuffs。 As soon as its prisoner was freed the machine rolled into its kennel and vanished。
  〃All right; wise guy; you're in any charge now; and dat means trouble for you; 〃 the sergeant snapped at Bill。 He had a shaven head; a wide and scar…covered jaw; small; closeset eyes in which there flickered the guttering candle of stupidity。
   Bill narrowed his own eyes to slits and slowly raised his good left right arm; flexing the biceps。 Tembo's muscle swelled and split the thin prison fatigue jacket with a harsh; ripping sound Then Bill pointed to the ribbon of the Purple Dart which he had pinned to his chest。
  〃Do you know how I got that?〃 he asked in a grim and toneless voice。 〃I got that by killing thirteen Chingers singlehanded in a pillbox I had been sent into。 I got into this stockade here because after killing the Chingers I came
back and killed the sergeant who sent me in there。 Now…what did you say about trouble; Sergeant?〃
  〃You don't give me no trouble I don't give you no trouble;〃 the guard sergeant squeaked as he skittered away。 〃You're in cell 13; in there; right upstairs 。 。 。 〃 He stopped suddenly and began to chew all the fingernails on one hand at the
same time; with a nibbling…crunching sound。 Bill gave him a long glower for good measure; then turned and went slowly into the building。
   The door to number 13 stood open; and Bill looked in at the narrow cell dimly lit by the light that filtered through the translucent plastic walls。 The double…decker bunk took up almost all of the space; leaving only a narrow passage at one side。 Two sagging shelves were bolted to the far wall and; along with the stenciled message BE CLEAN NOT OBSCENEDIRTY TALK HELPS THE ENEMY!; made up the plete furnishings。 A small man with a pointed face and beady eyes lay on the bottom bunk looking intently at Bill。 Bill looked right back and frowned。
   〃e in; Sarge;〃 the little man said as he scuttled up the support into the upper bunk。 〃I been saving the lower for you; yes I have。 The name is; Blackey; and I'm doing ten months for telling a second looey to blow it out 。 。 。〃
   He ended the sentence with a slight questioning note that Bill ignored。 Bill's feet hurt。 He kicked off the purple boots and stretched out on the sack。 Blackey's head popped over the edge of the upper bunk; not unlike a rodent peering out the landscape。 〃It's a long time to chow…how's about a Dobbin… burger?〃 A hand appeared next to the head and slipped a shiny package down to Bill。 
  After looking it over suspiciously Bill pulled the sealing string on the end of the plastic bag。 As soon as the air rushed in and hit the bustible lining the burger started to smoke and within three seconds was steaming hot。 Lifting the bun Bill squirted ketchup in from the little sack at the other end of the bag; then took a suspicious bite。 It was rich; juicy horse。 
  〃This old gray mare sure tastes like it used to be;〃 Bill said; talking with his mouth full。 〃How did you ever smuggle this into the stockade?〃
   Blackey grinned and produced a broad stage wink。 〃Contacts。 They bring it in to me; all I gotta do is ask。 I didn't catch the name 。 。 。 ?〃
  〃Bill。〃 Food had soothed his ruffled temper。 〃A year and a day for sleeping on duty。 I would have been shot for desertion; but I had a good lawyer。 That was a good burger; too bad there's nothing to wash it down with。〃
  Blackey produced a small bottle labeled COUGH SYRUP and passed it to Bill。 〃Specially mixed for me by a friend in the medics。 Half grain alcohol and half ether。〃
  〃Zoingg!〃 Bill said; dashing the tears from his eyes after draining half the bottle。 He felt almost at peace with the world。 You're a good buddy to have around; Blackey。〃
  〃You can say that again;〃 Blackey told him earnestly。 〃It never hurts to have a buddy; not in the troopers; the army; the navy; anywheres。 Ask old Blackey; he knows。 You got muscles; Bill?〃
  Bill lazily flexed Tembo's muscles for him。
   〃That's what I like to see;〃 Blackey said in admiration。 〃With your muscles and my brain we can get along fine 。 。 。〃
  〃I have a brain too!〃
   〃Relax it! Give it a break; while I do the thinking。 I seen service in more armies than you got days in the troopers。 I got my first Purple Heart serving with Hannibal; there's the scar right there。〃 He pointed to a white arc on the back of his hand。 〃But I picked him for a loser and switched to Romulus and Remus' boys while there was still time。 I been learning ever since; and I always land on my feet。 I saw which way the wind was blowing and ate some laundry soap and got the trots the morning of Waterloo; and I missed but nothing; I tell you。 I。 saw the same kind of thing shaping up at the Somme…or was it Ypres?…I forget some of them old names now; and chewed a cigarette and put it into my armpit; you get a fever that way; and missed that show too。 There's always an angle to figure I always say。〃
  〃I never heard of those battles。 Fighting the Chingers?〃
   〃No; earlier than that; a lot earlier than that。 Wars and wars ago。〃
   〃That makes you pretty old; Blackey。 You don't look pretty old。〃
  〃I am pretty old; but I don't tell people usually because they give me the laugh。 But I remember the pyramids being built; and I remember what lousy chow the Assyrian army had; and the time we took over Wug's mob when they tried to get into our cave; rolled rocks down on them。〃
  〃Sounds like a lot of bowb;〃 Bill said lazily; draining the bottle。 
  〃Yeah; that's what everybody says; so I don't tell the old stories any more。 They don't even believe me when I show them my good luck piece。〃 He held out a little white triangle with a ragged edge。 〃Tooth from a pterodactyl。 Knocked it down myself with a stone from a sling I had just invented 。 。 。〃
   〃Looks like a hunk of plastic。〃
  〃See what I mean? So I don't tell the old stories any more。 just keep re… enlisting and drifting with the tide。 。 。〃
  Bill sat up and g

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