the lily of the valley-第9节
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within it; would probably not have lived in the atmosphere of a city。
Country air and her mother's brooding care had kept the life in that
frail body; delicate as a hot…house plant growing in a harsh and
foreign climate。 Though in nothing did she remind me of her mother;
Madeleine seemed to have her soul; and that soul held her up。 Her hair
was scanty and black; her eyes and cheeks hollow; her arms thin; her
chest narrow; showing a battle between life and death; a duel without
truce in which the mother had so far been victorious。 The child willed
to live;perhaps to spare her mother; for at times; when not
observed; she fell into the attitude of a weeping…willow。 You might
have thought her a little gypsy dying of hunger; begging her way;
exhausted but always brave and dressed up to play her part。
〃Where have you left Jacques?〃 asked the countess; kissing the white
line which parted the child's hair into two bands that looked like a
crow's wings。
〃He is coming with papa。〃
Just then the count entered; holding his son by the hand。 Jacques; the
image of his sister; showed the same signs of weakness。 Seeing these
sickly children beside a mother so magnificently healthy it was
impossible not to guess at the causes of the grief which clouded her
brow and kept her silent on a subject she could take to God only。 As
he bowed; Monsieur de Mortsauf gave me a glance that was less
observing than awkwardly uneasy;the glance of a man whose distrust
grows out of his inability to analyze。 After explaining the
circumstances of our visit; and naming me to him; the countess gave
him her place and left the room。 The children; whose eyes were on
those of their mother as if they drew the light of theirs from hers;
tried to follow her; but she said; with a finger on her lips; 〃Stay
dears!〃 and they obeyed; but their eyes filled。 Ah! to hear that one
word 〃dears〃 what tasks they would have undertaken!
Like the children; I felt less warm when she had left us。 My name
seemed to change the count's feeling toward me。 Cold and supercilious
in his first glance; he became at once; if not affectionate; at least
politely attentive; showing me every consideration and seeming pleased
to receive me as a guest。 My father had formerly done devoted service
to the Bourbons; and had played an important and perilous; though
secret part。 When their cause was lost by the elevation of Napoleon;
he took refuge in the quietude of the country and domestic life;
accepting the unmerited accusations that followed him as the
inevitable reward of those who risk all to win all; and who succumb
after serving as pivot to the political machine。 Knowing nothing of
the fortunes; nor of the past; nor of the future of my family; I was
unaware of this devoted service which the Comte de Mortsauf well
remembered。 Moreover; the antiquity of our name; the most precious
quality of a man in his eyes; added to the warmth of his greeting。 I
knew nothing of these reasons until later; for the time being the
sudden transition to cordiality put me at my ease。 When the two
children saw that we were all three fairly engaged in conversation;
Madeleine slipped her head from her father's hand; glanced at the open
door; and glided away like an eel; Jacques following her。 They
rejoined their mother; and I heard their voices and their movements;
sounding in the distance like the murmur of bees about a hive。
I watched the count; trying to guess his character; but I became so
interested in certain leading traits that I got no further than a
superficial examination of his personality。 Though he was only forty…
five years old; he seemed nearer sixty; so much had the great
shipwreck at the close of the eighteenth century aged him。 The
crescent of hair which monastically fringed the back of his head;
otherwise completely bald; ended at the ears in little tufts of gray
mingled with black。 His face bore a vague resemblance to that of a
white wolf with blood about its muzzle; for his nose was inflamed and
gave signs of a life poisoned at its springs and vitiated by diseases
of long standing。 His flat forehead; too broad for the face beneath
it; which ended in a point; and transversely wrinkled in crooked
lines; gave signs of a life in the open air; but not of any mental
activity; it also showed the burden of constant misfortunes; but not
of any efforts made to surmount them。 His cheekbones; which were brown
and prominent amid the general pallor of his skin; showed a physical
structure which was likely to ensure him a long life。 His hard; light…
yellow eye fell upon mine like a ray of wintry sun; bright without
warmth; anxious without thought; distrustful without conscious cause。
His mouth was violent and domineering; his chin flat and long。 Thin
and very tall; he had the bearing of a gentleman who relies upon the
conventional value of his caste; who knows himself above others by
right; and beneath them in fact。 The carelessness of country life had
made him neglect his external appearance。 His dress was that of a
country…man whom peasants and neighbors no longer considered except
for his territorial worth。 His brown and wiry hands showed that he
wore no gloves unless he mounted a horse; or went to church; and his
shoes were thick and common。
Though ten years of emigration and ten years more of farm…life had
changed his physical condition; he still retained certain vestiges of
nobility。 The bitterest liberal (a term not then in circulation) would
readily have admitted his chivalric loyalty and the imperishable
convictions of one who puts his faith to the 〃Quotidienne〃; he would
have felt respect for the man religiously devoted to a cause; honest
in his political antipathies; incapable of serving his party but very
capable of injuring it; and without the slightest real knowledge of
the affairs of France。 The count was in fact one of those upright men
who are available for nothing; but stand obstinately in the way of
all; ready to die under arms at the post assigned to them; but
preferring to give their life rather than to give their money。
During dinner I detected; in the hanging of his flaccid cheeks and the
covert glances he cast now and then upon his children; the traces of
some wearing thought which showed for a moment upon the surface。
Watching him; who could fail to understand him? Who would not have
seen that he had fatally transmitted to his children those weakly
bodies in which the principle of life was lacking。 But if he blamed
himself he denied to others the right to judge him。 Harsh as one who
knows himself in fault; yet without greatness of soul or charm to
compensate for the weight of misery he had thrown into the balance;
his private life was no doubt the scene of irascibilities that were
plainly revealed in his angular features and by the incessant
restlessness of his eye。 When his wife returned; followed by the
children who seemed fastened to her side; I felt the presence of
unhappiness; just as in walking over the roof of a vault the feet
become in some way conscious of the depths below。 Seeing these four
human beings together; holding them all as it were in one glance;
letting my eye pass from one to the other; studying their countenances
and their respective attitudes; thoughts steeped in sadness fell upon
my heart as a fine gray rain dims a charming landscape after the sun
has risen clear。
When the immediate subject of conversation was exhausted the count
told his wife who I was; and related certain circumstances connected
with my family that were wholly unknown to me。 He asked me my age。
When I told it; the countess echoed my own exclamation of surprise at
her daughter's age。 Perhaps she had thought me fifteen。 Later on; I
discovered that this was still another tie which bound her strongly to
me。 Even then I read her soul。 Her motherhood quivered with a tardy
ray of hope。 Seeing me at over twenty years of age so slight and
delicate and yet so nervously strong; a voice cried to her; 〃They too
will live!〃 She looked at me searchingly; and in that moment I felt
the barriers of ice melting between us。 She seemed to have many
questions to ask; but uttered none。
〃If study has made you ill;〃 she said; 〃the air of our valley will
soon restore you。〃
〃Modern education is fatal to children;〃 remarked the count。 〃We stuff
them with mathematics and ruin their health with sciences; and make
them old before their time。 You must stay and rest here;〃 he added;
turning to me。 〃You are crushed by the avalanche of ideas that have
rolled down upon you。 What sort of future will this universal
education bring upon us unless we prevent its evils by replacing
public education in the hands of the religious bodies?〃
These words were in harmony with a speech he afterwards made at the
elections when he refused his support to a man whose gifts would have
done good service to the royalist cause。 〃I