the red acorn-第31节
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〃Yes；〃 said he； lapsing still deeper into a mood which she soon came to recognize in him as a frequent one of spiritual exaltation； 〃we who toil here； labor amidst the wreck and ruin of war without the benefit of that stirring impulse which fills the souls of those who actually go into battle。 The terrors of human suffering which they see but for an instant； as when the lightning in the night shows the ravages of the storm； encompass us about and abide with us continually。 We are called upon for another kind of fortitude； and we must look for our reward otherwise than in the victor's laurels。 We can only have to animate us our own consciousness of a high duty well done。 To one class of minds this is an infinitely rich meed。 The old Jewish legend says that Abrahams principal jewel was one worn upon his breast； 'whose light raised those who were bowed down； and healed the sick；' and when he passed from earth it was placed in heaven； where it shown as one of the great stars。 Of such kind must be our jewel。〃
He stopped； and blushing through his beard； as if ashamed of his heroics； said with a light laugh：
〃But if there is anything I fear it is self…righteousness which cankereth the soul。 Come； I will show you a sight which will repress any tendency you may ever feel to exalt your services to the pinnacle of human merit。〃
While leading her to a remote part of the hospital he continued： 〃Of course greater love hath no man than this； that he gave his life for that which he loves。 Considered relatively to the person the peasant who falls in the defense of his country gives just as much as the Emperor who may die by his side。 In either case the measure of devotion is brim…full。 Nothing more can be added to it。 But there are accessories and surroundings which apparently make one life of much greater value than another； and make it a vastly richer sacrifice when laid on the altar of patriotism。〃
〃There are certainly degrees of merit； even in yielding up one's life；〃 said Rachel； not altogther unmindful of the sacrifice she herself had made in coming to the front。
〃Judged by this standard；〃 the Doctor continued； 〃the young man whom we are about to see has made a richer offering to his country than it is possible for most men to make。 It is almost shames me as to the meagerness of the gift I bring。〃
〃If you be ashamed how must others who give much less feel？〃
〃He was in the first dawn of manhood；〃 the Doctor went on； without noticing the interruption； 〃handsome as a heathen god； educated and wealty； and with high aspirations for a distinguished scientific career fermenting in his young blood like new wine。 Yet he turned his back upon all thisupon the opening of a happy married lifeto carry a private soldier's musket in the ranks； and to die ingloriously by the shot of a skulking bushwhacker。 He would not even take a commision； because he wanted that used to encourage some other man； who might need the inducement。〃
〃But why call his death inglorious？ If a man braves death why is any one time or place worse than another？〃
〃Because for a man of his temperament he is dying the cruelest death possible。 He had expected； if called upon to yield his life； to purchase with it some great good for his country。 But to perish uselessly as he is doing； as if bitten by a snake； is terrible。 Here we are。 I will tell you before we go in that he has a bullet wound through the body； just grazing an artery and it is only a question of a short time； and the slightest shock； when a fatal hemorrhage will ensue。 Be very quiet and careful。〃
He untied a rope stretched across the entrance to a little wing of the building to keep unnecessary footsteps at a distance。
〃How is he this morning？〃 he asked of a gray…haired nurse seated in front of a door curtained with a blanket。
〃Quiet and cheeful as ever；〃 answered the nurse； rising and pulling the blanket aside that they might enter。
The face upon which Rachel's eyes fell when she entered the room impressed her as an unusual combination of refinement and strength。 Beyond this she noted little as to the details of the patient's countenance； except that he had hazel eyes； and a clear complexion asserting itself under the deep sun…burning。
When they entered he was languidly fanning himself with a fan which had been ingeniously constructed for him by some inmate； out of a twig of willow bent into a hoop； and covered by pasting paper over it。 He gave a faint smile of welcome to the Doctor； but his face lighted up with pleasure when he saw Rachel。
〃Good morning； Sanderson；〃 said Dr。 Denslow； in a repressed voice。 〃How do you feel？〃
〃As usual；〃 whispered Sanderson。
〃This is Miss Rachel Bond； who is assigned to our hospital as nurse。〃
A slight movement of Sanderson's head acknowledged Rachel's bow。
〃I am so glad to see you；〃 he whispered； taking hold of her hand。 〃Sit down there； please。〃
Rachel took the indicated seat at the head of the cot。
〃Doctor；〃 inquired Sanderson； 〃is it true that McClellan has had to fall back from before Richmond？〃
〃I have tried hard to keep the news from you；〃 answered Dr。 Denslow； reluctantly。 〃I feat it is too true。 Let us hope it is only a temporary reverse； and that it will soon be more than overcome。〃
〃Not in time for me；〃 said Sanderson； in deep dejection。 〃I have lived several days merely because I wanted to see Richmond taken before I died。 I can wait no longer。〃
The Doctor essayed some confused words of encouragement； but stopped abruptly； and feigning important business in another part of the hospital； hurried out； bidding Rachel await his return。
When he was gone Sanderson lifted Rachel's hand to his lips； and said with deep feeling：
〃I am so glad you have come。 You remind me of her。〃
The ebbing life welled up for the last time into such ardent virility that Rachel's first maidenly instinct was to withdraw her hand from his earnest pressure and kiss。
〃No； do not take your hand away；〃 he said eagerly。 〃There need be no shame； for I shall be clay almost before you flush has had time to fade。 I infringe on no other's rights； for I see in you only another whom you much resemble。〃
Rachel suffered her hand to remain within his grasp。
〃I would that she knew as you do； that I died thinking of her； next to my country。 You will write and tell her so。 The Doctor will give you her address； and you can tell her； as only a woman can tell another what the woman…heart hungers for； of my last moments。 It is so much better that you should do it than Dr。 Denslow； even； grand as he is in every way。 You will tell her that there was not a thought of repiningthat I felt that giving my life was only partial payment to those who gave theirs to purchase for me every good thing that I have enjoyed。 I had twenty…five years of as happy a life as ever a man lived； and she came as its crowning joy。 I look forward almost eagerly to what that Power； which has made every succeeding year of my life happier than the previous one； has in store for me in the awakening beyond。 Ah； see there！ It has come。 There goes my life。〃
She looked in the direction of his gaze； and saw a pool of blood slowly spreading out from under the bed； banking itself against the dust into miniature gulfs and seas。 The hand that held hers relaxed； and looking around she saw his eyes closed as if in peaceful sleep。
Dr。 Denslow entered while she still gazed on the dead face； and said：
〃I am so sorry I left you alone。 I did not expect this for some hours。〃
〃How petty and selfish all my life has been；〃 said Rachel； dejectedly； as they left the room。
〃Not a particle more than his was； probably；〃 said Dr。 Denslow； 〃until his opportunity came。 It is opportunity that makes the hero； as well as the less reputable personage； and I haev no doubt that when yours comes； you will redeem yourself from all blame of selfishness and pettiness。〃
Chapter XVI。 The Ambuscade。
This heavy…headed revel； east and west； Makes us traduced and taxed of other nations； They clepe us drunkards； and with swinish frase Soul our addition： and indeed it takes From our achievements； though performed at hight； The pith and marrow of our attribute。Hamlet。
The day spent with Aunt Debby had been of the greatest benefit to Harry Glen。 Since his parting with Rachel Bond； there had been going on in his spirit a fermentation like that with which good wine discharges itself of its grossness and impurities； and becomes clear and fine。 In this process had vanished the absorbing selfishness of a much…indulged only son； and teh supercilious egotism which came as an almost necessary result of his college curriculum。 This spiritual ripening received its perfecting color and bloom from the serene exaltation of Aunt Debby's soul。 So filled was she with lofty devotion to the cause； so complete her faith in its holiness； and so unquestioning her belief that it was every one's simple duty to brave all dangers for it； and die if need be without a murmur； that contact with her would have inspired with pure patriotic ardor a nature much less ready for such leavening than Harry's。
As Dr。 Denslow had surmised； his faults were mainly superficial； and
